Today, I woke up early to take my dog for a walk. I wore spandex shorts. I stopped to talk to several people I know and passed a group of hot construction workers who checked me out. I just got home and realized I have the biggest cameltoe I've ever seen in my life. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I took my dog out for his walk, only to find out that I had an extra bra hanging vertically out of my pants. Thankfully, the only person who saw me was the maintenance guy, who looked very confused, so I just smiled at him. I had no idea why, I only realized when the wind blew it against my leg and I saw my shadow. FML
Today, I got out of bed and immediately went to the window as it was supposed to snow today. I saw a man walking his dog and he waved at me. I waved back enthusiastically and realised I was naked. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog around the block, I fell in the splits position on wet dirt and ripped my pants right on the front. I then had to walk home casually holding a chihuahua on my crotch hoping I would not run into anyone. FML
Today, while walking my dog, I saw a hot guy so I tried to look chill. My dog chose that exact moment to take an enormous dump. I didn’t have any bags. The dude stared while I pretended to check my phone until he walked off. FML
Today, I was walking out of work. I felt like everyone was staring at me but brushed it off. It wasn't until I got home that I realized I had toilet paper sticking out of my pants. FML
Today, after my shift at the hospital ended, I happened to look into a full-length mirror. My new scrubs turned out to be see-through. Instead of my undies, everyone got a good look at my cellulite-ridden ass. Fan-fucking-tastic day to wear a thong. FML
Today, the same day I decided to stubbornly go commando because my lazy boyfriend hasn’t taken his turn to do our laundry in 4 days was also the day I split my shorts squatting down to pick up my bag at the bus stop. Ten strangers saw my bare asscrack, and two teenagers started cat calling me for my butt tattoo. FML
Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML
Today, I got up from bed after a good night's sleep, and walked outside. The first thing I saw was my 60-ish year-old neighbor bent over, picking up a newspaper. He was wearing nothing but a way too short bathrobe and a pair of rubber boots. FML
Today, I walked out of the bathroom when two guys were checking me out and said "nice tail" I smiled and strutted to my next class. When I was about to sit down in my desk, the girl behind me said "did you know you have toilet paper hanging out of your pants?" FML
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Top comments
raged_fml 0
CAMELTOWNED!
genius_man16 1
That's pretty nasty. Wear less tight shorts next time.
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Comments (193)
ellameno 2
I don't buy that you didn't know. How exactly do you not feel spandex (or any material for that matter) all up in your cootch?
Wildcard 0
...how do you not realize your pants are half way up your vag?
lillyass 0
What did #1 say????
kellster 2
Well, what the hell were you expecting, wearing spandex shorts??? That they would be loose and flowy around your vag? Lesson of the day: don't wear spandex, wear normal clothes like a normal person. Problem solved.
patriciaeff 0
Spandex is made to be worn under other things. No matter how "cute" you think you look, you look like an idiot. You deserved that, no question
silvermoonstar3 3
HOW did you not feel it?
falcon_paunch 0
BAD IDEA.
reetah 0
soooo here's my two cents on the leggings-pants debate: about 90% of girls who wear leggings as pants look BAD. there are about 10% who have the body to pull it off without looking like a total *****. but that other majority either has too much weight (not a bad thing, but they shouldn't wear tight clothing, it just doesn't work!) or it looks like they're trying to hard to show off their body which is a turn off. and that's just my opinion. if you don't agree with it melanie what'syourface... I don't really care. :
Polionixon 2
THANK YOU #140!!!!
NoNeak 0
i think i've seen bigger....hahaha @9 FTW !!