Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my fiancé is already married. His "crazy ex-wife" is not all that crazy, and is still his wife. FML
Today, I found our that my crazy ex, who, after our break up, said to me, "I'm setting my life to make yours hell" has befriended my current girlfriend. FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend woke up from a coma that lasted a few months. Her parents called me from the hospital shortly after because she was in hysterics that I wasn't there. Apparently she thinks we're still together, and I now have to somehow break up with her again after almost a year apart. FML
Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML
Today, I woke up in a pool of what felt like sweat and tears. Little did I realize, my then-girlfriend had snuck into the house and drenched me in salty water to get me back for kissing her sister. I guess we're even now. FML
Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML
Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Anon17564 3
I think being drugged and raped is a bit too much for just FML... Go to the ******* police.
Zwische 13
....the ****?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (287)
sabsguitarist77 0
You're definitely full of shit.
kewl92 0
I'm calling fake... if that happened to me the first thing in my mind wouldn't be posting it here
Lolitia 4
IDK I've posted messed up stuff that's happened to be before here too, not that they ever got accepted but sometimes it's just the hysterics that make it feel like it's kinda funny in a sick twisted way.
Flounder 2
I read this three times and still have no clue what it says.
_ahbigfatmonkeys 0
basicly his ex drugged him an raped him cuz she was still in love with him an now has a bun in the oven via raping a knocked out guy
hazelwolfeyes 0
o.o..i threatened my master with something like this...LOL but seriously if this is real...you need to report her. next thing you know shell be sitting out your window on a rainy night screaming your name... then when you think its over...she kills you cause if she cant have you...no one can... crazy ass women. some girls just need to learn to move on, be fixed, or be locked up... n for those of you who say its fake cause he wouldnt be posting...maybe its a way for him to cope with what happened or maybe he is warning others of the crazy chick running around drugging people...o.O...interesting...
tsarikos 0
Um. Statistically more men commit relationship-related homicides than women.
hazelwolfeyes 0
i didnt mean for it to sound like all women are crazy n are the only ones that commit horrible acts in a psycho rage...but that there are...n this is one chick that has those moments... men do this stuff...but women are capable of doing it as well. i had a friend that is an example of 'if i cant have you no other bitch will.' only thing that stopped her was her friend that she text called the cops. i know too many crazy chicks...-_-
YDIBITCHES 0
Um.statistically more women commit relationship related suicide then men
v1knownaz_chris 0
you got capture by a raging lesbian tribe. sit tight and pray to god their hot and like getting naked
movies12 0
Well.......if you are a nice guy, you wouldn't go to the police, but if you want REVENGE than I WOULD go. But also now that ur ex....if she still is your ex is pregnant, I would stay with her, but she is a CRAZY LADY for DRUGING people.
hazelwolfeyes 0
why should he stay with her cause she went all psycho n raped him? **** man, run! n when she has the baby...fight for custody rights n make sure she never sees you or the child again...
Polionixon 2
just push her down the stairs while shes preg. No crazy bitch like that needs to be even carryin g a baby sorry to be so blunt.
kittykat1501 31
That's what she wants, she will think rape is ok, if he does stay
RAMBabyyy 0
Femidiot is an idiot. OP, get the bitch locked up. Or a restraining order. Something.
popemichael 9
That's happened to me before too: 1. Get checked out for date-rape drugs. 2. Use and abuse her to fulfill every dirty fantasy that you've ever had. Any moral objection to #2 that you have should be canceled out by the fact that she date-raped you.
normandin131 0
I agree sir.
MadeOfAwesome 1
Umm... Not familiar with that brand of crazy