Today, I was on a 12-hour transatlantic flight. I asked the flight attendant where the rancid smell was coming from. The guy sitting next to me started laughing, saying, "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour one of the flight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm on a 14-hour flight, stuck next to a large man whose rancid body odor is eclipsed only by his constant flatulence, which he loudly blames on me every time. On my other side is his friend who laughs like a moose at everything. There are no empty seats and no-one will trade with me. FML
Today, I'm on a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML
Today, I boarded my flight and sat next to a man. I told him I had hoped he was a hot woman and he concurred. He said at least I wasn't obese and I replied "At least you aren't smelly". Minutes later I realize he had the most disgusting foot odour ever... the barefoot kind. I suffered for 11 hours. FML
Today, I had a several-hour-long flight. I was put in a seat at the very back of the plane. Before the plane even lifted off, a woman took a dump in the bathroom that I stank for the rest of the flight. Whenever I tried to get some sleep, the flight attendant walked past, savagely jostling me. FML
Today, I got my own row on an almost full transatlantic flight. All it took was having food poisoning two hours into the flight. FML
Today, I'm in the middle seat on a flight to Dallas. The guy on the aisle is sleeping with his mouth open and I can smell his breath. I feel nauseous. FML
Today, I discovered the worst possible situation in which to get explosive diarrhea: on a 9-hour transatlantic flight. Next to an attractive single guy. FML
Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML
Today, during a long flight, I tried to discreetly pass gas. Instead, I misjudged the pressure and ended up making a loud noise that everyone around me seemingly heard. To make matters worse, the flight attendant asked if everything was OK. Now I’m probably remembered as "Farts on a plane." FML
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Top comments
skinny_love 0
A "trans-Atlantic flight overseas?" YDI for being redundant.
Thehappygoose 0
A trans-Atlantic flight overseas. Is there any other kind?
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Comments (48)
TheBigGamer 0
did they shit themselves or something?
xCrackerx 3
He farted. Dumbass. Do you need someone to hold your hand and explain everything?
tyhillman 0
1 hour isn't that long.
Intoxicunt 6
Yeah, and that's the amount of time elapsed out of TWELVE hours. 12 - 1 = 11. Eleven hours is a good while to gag on someone's gas fumes.
redbluegreen 41
Did you not read the FML? It's a 12 hour flight. That as just in the first hour. Intoxicunt, for some reason that made me laugh. Thank you. (:
Intoxicunt 6
You're welcome! :]
tyhillman 0
Oops my bed fellas haha I guess I had a brain fart.
reverseesrever 0
Today, I was on a 12 hour trans-Atlantic flight overseas. The guy beside me asked the flight attendant where this rancid smell was coming from. I started laughing and told him "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour 1 of the flight. MLIA
urface132 0
o I get it now ;)
2345_fml 0
HAHA That sucks.
skinny_love 0
A "trans-Atlantic flight overseas?" YDI for being redundant.
BoredReader88 5
My thought exactly
plexico 4
What? He didn't bring enough rotten, contaminated, vomit- and diarrhea-inducing slop to share some with you? What a pig! The belch that comes from digesting rotten beef smells like the gates of Hell -- or parts of New Jersey.
Pandasaur 0
This was lovely to read after eating. 'Scuse me while I go throw up.
plexico 4
Sorry that your loss is my win. :( :)
Pandasaur 0
Hah, it happens.
allmidnighteyes 11
Shit happens
the_stereotype 0
haha, and then whoever was sitting next to the bathroom would have to smell THAT for the rest of the flight. but hey, at least there wasn't a baby with a possible ear infection. they'll smell AND then they'll scream and cry about it for the rest of the flight.
v1knownaz_chris 0
*farts* everyone loves their own flavour
movies12 0
Move to a different spot. Or just deal with it, but I would do the first one, cause if that was me I would not be able to sit thru a flight with 11 MORE hours.
NaziZombie 0
Redundant
Jincos 0
Ask to switch seats, pussy.
the_stereotype 0
you can't just switch seats on an overseas flight.