Intimacy: Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while and realized...

By Anonymous - 12/05/2009 23:08 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while and realized that I can lift way more with my left hand than with my right even though I am right handed. I also realized that I jack off with my left hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 012

You deserved it 58 997

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 19:18 - United States

Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 740

You deserved it 37 950

I have no idea what I'm doing

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 10:00

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and couldn't figure out how to use any of the equipment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 538

You deserved it 302

By dawg3360 - 07/06/2009 06:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 636

You deserved it 134 186

By likeyourboss - 04/10/2013 16:05 - Denmark

Today, I went to the gym. I tried out a new machine where you do one-arm weightlifting. I took my time to get into a good position, then set the machine to the lowest weight possible. I couldn't even lift it an inch. A bunch of buff guys nearby saw me and burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 703

You deserved it 5 945

Getting on

By Anonymous - 01/05/2021 23:00

Today, I realized that I’m old, and that it’s been too long since I had sex or even masturbated. How did I notice? Because I tried to, and I found out I couldn’t comfortably spread my legs that far anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 057

You deserved it 284

By Anonymous - 24/01/2017 20:00

Today, my hand fell asleep while I was masturbating. My own body rejected me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 843

You deserved it 1 599

Overdoing it a bit

By Anonymous - 12/11/2022 16:00

Today, I masturbated so hard I got a cramp in my forearm muscle so unexpectedly that my hand spasmed, slipped off my penis, and I punched myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 1 148

By Delilah - 01/03/2010 08:53 - Norway

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 843

You deserved it 9 768

Take it easy

By Endrit Begolli - 27/06/2023 00:02 - Albania

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was so out of shape that I couldn't even finish my warm-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 210

By tomchuq - 30/08/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 662

You deserved it 61 241

Nyxen 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 12:37

That's pretty impressive really. Maybe you should switch it up from time to time, and then you'd be able to do serious lifting with both arms.

wollzilla 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 12:35

hahah same. i lose arm wrestling when i use my right hand, but whenever i use my left, i own.

Comments

jaybrown 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 22:58

I've posted 5 FMLs that didn't make it, 2 with this account that were waay better than this. HOW DID THIS GET UP!!?!?!?!?

xtremelifter 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 23:02

this really isn't fml noteworthy

CaptainPat 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 23:14

my friends make fun of me because theres actually a VISUAL difference in mine like my right arm is more than double the size of my left. like and when ever we're talking to someone my friends always like show em your arms! and im like no! then people always laugh at me.

lauramary71 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 23:51

you use your left arm because you need the right for the mouse? haha;)

theoffkid 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 23:59

Hahaha, hilarious!

michelle4srs 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 0:05

Reminds me of the dangers of masturbation picture someone edited where it shows a guy that's really scrawny on one side and really, really muscle-y on the other.