Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, after going to the beach with my guy friend, I thought I looked pretty good in front of him in a bikini. Later he whispered in my ear, "You have a lot of hairs sticking out of your bottom." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML
Today, I had a date with this really cute guy. He invited me over to make dinner at his place. Eventually we end up in his bedroom to have sex. He pulls down my panties and says, "You need to shave that shit." FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML
Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML
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Top comments
Cinn_fml 23
Well, you knew how revealing your swimsuit would be, therefore if you could see more hair than you wanted to be seen, you should have dealt with it. Though if he gets freaked out by something natural, you might want to reconsider his maturity levels. Unless he was just joking.
billywhyte 0
BAHAHA! wait....was there really a squirrel?
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Comments (253)
xXDubbleChic 11
omg! i read this exactly when Candice from phineas and ferb, was the "squirrles in my pants" dance. lol
yorkiegirl1691 0
phineas and ferb reference ftw.
TheyCallMeThumpe_fml 0
S I M P SQUIRRELS IN MY PANTS!!!!! xD
rosepetals91 3
heehee I luv squirrels don't b ashamed... but I would shave next time
FucMyFucingLife 0
im thinking she did shave her bikini line but she moved a certain way and he happened to be staring at her at that moment so he saw the huge bush that normally wouldnt have been visible. btw all the ***** who commented saying something along the lines of shave on every date...you have to be a ****/***** to even consider the possibility of a guy seeing any part of your pussy on a date even if it was the 3rd but especially the first.
Craven_Morrhead 0
A real man would have offered to feed your squirrel his nuts. Besides, didn't your mother teach you not to layer clothing in the summer? Either go with the bikini bottom or the hair diaper - not both!
angelove91 0
i dont understand the whole concept of shaving before every date, maybe thats because im not a **** who gives it up that easy, but whatever and as for shaving just to wear a swimsuit thats just as ridicules! maybe shes comfortable just the way she is, and theres nothing wrong with that!!!
latexNlipgloss 0
S-I-M-P SQUIRRELS IN MY PANTS...actually YOUR pants lmaoooooo
AmazingLadar 3
always shave ur downstairs when you go to the beach. YDI
itsxbabyxjay 0
That's Not Cute.