Today, I went to Starbucks to get coffee. The employees told me that there was no more coffee. I started cursing at them and told them that I am in a really big hurry, and that I need coffee every day. They had been yelling back the whole time. Little did I realize, they were saying April Fool's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to admit that my coffee addiction is really bad when I woke up in a Starbucks with no memory of how I got there. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I "didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML
Today, I walked into Starbucks for a job application. I asked the manager if they were hiring, as I really need a job. He looked me up and down and replied, "NO!" There was a 'Now hiring' sign in the window. FML
Today, I went to Starbucks to get my free birthday coffee and due to a mistake I received two. Thinking it was my lucky day, I hurried off to work. As I was walking in, I tripped and spilt one coffee all over my new dress. Then I walked into a door and spilt the other. FML
Today, I stopped at Starbucks to get tea before work and was surprised that there wasn't a line. As I was leaving, the automatic door closed, knocking my tea out of my hand. I headed back in, only to discover a huge line had formed and they made me pay for the replacement that their door spilled. FML
Today, at work, a customer came in and ordered a "Butterbeer Frappuccino." When I said we serve no such thing, she yelled at me for "lying" to her, saying she knew about our "secret menu." She ended up complaining to my manager and demanded that he fire me. FML
Today, I was late for work and got chewed out by my boss. To console myself I decided to drink a cup of coffee and a cup of tea. My work provides this for free. When I did, my boss told me that in fact it wasn't, nor has it ever been, free; all this time I've been stealing other people's coffee. FML
Today, I went into a small coffee shop. In line, a guy came up to me and was like, "I haven't seen you here before, are you new in town?" and I replied with, "Oh, no I've lived here for years. The coffee here is crap, though, so I only come here when Starbucks is full." He's the owner of the shop. FML
Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML
Today, I went to my favorite coffee shop, ordered my usual, smiled at the barista I have a crush on, and confidently said, "You too!" when they told me to enjoy my drink. I have to find a new coffee shop. FML
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Top comments
sleepless15_p 0
You are an asshole. Why would you be so rude to the employees anyways?
Stupidpeople 0
If i'd of been working in the shop i'd of refused to serve you after being so rude.....or added a little something special when making the drink!! hehe!!
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Comments (238)
may_cause_fail 0
Who the **** -needs- coffee every day? You are a jackass, and totally deserved them. I also suggest switching to someplace else for your pathetic addiction. Starbucks is expensive.
voice_of_reason 0
#105 & 106 - great to see that you're really getting into it!!! LOL #9 - in your profile picture, which of the three is you? Are you the ugly one?
isantorin 0
why the **** do you need coffee every day? Asshole.
mehwhateverr 0
yes, because the people at Starbucks should get enough coffee FOR YOU and only YOU, am I right? you're egocentric.
caught22 0
thats not an FML .... and you weren't being rude you were reacting to not having coffee... its understandable. but... not an FML, just a funny april fools day story
pinkdaisy 0
starbucks is not really that expensive, if your getting just a regular cup of drip coffee, its the latte's and syrup that make it a bit more expensive.
jessxoxo28 5
wow, u really suck go get ur precious coffee somewhere else
jet_fml 0
notalwaysright.com much?
sulitak 27
oh. a new site to waste time on! thank you!
lalala27 0
you sound like a douche bag. you should probably work on that.
rachelroller 0
HAHA #135 hit it. What a douche to be screaming at people serving you. UGH!