Today, I went to run outside, only to smack straight into our sliding glass door. Just a few hours beforehand, my mom put up a strip of colored tape to stop this from happening. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML
Today, my son tripped into a door and slammed it shut. I'd been holding onto the door frame, leaning around to talk to a neighbour, so of course it slammed my fingers. It must be a really sharp door, because I just woke from the surgery to reattach my three amputated fingers. FML
Today, looking out of my window, I spotted a fire raging in the building across from my apartment. Grabbing my phone, I dashed out to the balcony, only to slam into the screen door instead. After calling 911, I sprinted back out, only to clock the door a second time. FML
Today, I walked into a glass door at the mall because I thought it was automatic. It wasn’t. The make up smudge from my face is now part of the door's Christmas decor. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, I walked into a glass door at a busy mall. Not only did I face-plant in front of a crowd, but I also left an almost perfect imprint of my face on the glass. FML
Today, as I left my house, the front door slammed shut behind me, causing an entire roof-length of snow to slide over the edge and land directly on my head. FML
Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
daydreamer244 13
so I guess the colored tape didn't help then?
ihavenosoul 4
Your mom must be so proud.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (160)
every1luvsboners 11
One of three thing caused this to happen: 1) You're stupid 2) You're stupid and blind 3) You were running from a prison escapee that has been know to sodomize youngsters.
phoenixslayer69 4
I am going to take #3 for 500 Bob
olpally 33
Ahhh... good to have every1luvsboners back haha :D
StoryOfTheYear 15
11- OP doesn't see what you did there.
swampbilly 5
Women...haha
RabbitPressure1 6
Men... Oh wait, nope, only you.
jawaqueen 1
Men can be just as stupid asshole
saIty 17
The same thing happened to me when I heard the music of the ice-cream man.
USMCpoolee94 0
How many times has that happened haha seriously
RabidBunny 10
It must be a very spotless glass door!
boredblonde 17
Only one word describes this: fail.
chessypie 0
Lol sooooo ture
nateiztite 5
your hot
JaykeXD 9
Nice one! Next time put a bigger piece of tape on it.:)
nikki_katch 1
id laugh harder if there was a video
Socalledproblem 5
I second that.
wheresyamum 1
Take solace in the fact that you had really, really clean glass up until that point. That's something to be proud of.
trollsemen 8
It's funny how people forget so easily.