By Anonymous - United States - Saint Paul
Today, I went to break up with my psychotic bitch of a girlfriend after months of abuse. When she opened the door, her 5-year-old son ran up to me, smiling and calling me "DADDY!" for the first time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho and devastate her son. FML
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By  thenewgirl29  |  20

If she is abusive towards you, I would have to wonder if her 5 year old is enduring the same thing? If so, I'd say get out of the relationship and look into ways of getting her help.

  quickit  |  24

I agree. After a kid called me his father it would be extremely difficult to turn around and leave. I am not saying OP should stay but you guys must realize how difficult it is to do what you're saying. It's much easier said than done.

By  patrickeli  |  15

The poor kid is already her son, so, unfortunately, he's probably damned to having psychological issues in the future whether you leave her or not. I say you should leave her.

  killerdana  |  19

That's what I was thinking #23. I hope that's the case and that the kid isn't too attached to op. Regardless, don't stay with her just because her child sees you as a father figure, it will be worse in the long run for the child

  Flaming_Pandas  |  15

If OP is serious about his girlfriend being crazy, you might want to make sure that her son is in good hands. I know it might be a burden, but it could be very important for his well-being.

  dragonkisses28  |  25

I would like to know how many "months" are in question here. She should not be encouraging her child to call you daddy after just a few months. I know everyone's instinct is to protect the child from the psychotic bitch, but honestly, that isn't your job. The only connection you have to this child is that you had the misfortune of meeting and dating his mother. Women are going to hate me for this, and I'm sure I'll burn in hell for saying it, but guys, you need to think about why you are in such a hurry to jump in and be a father to a child that isn't yours? My ex is "daddy" to my two kids; however, he isn't the biological father of either child. We were together for a long time. He raised my children since they were babies, and he continues to take my children every other weekend, as their father, even though we are no longer together. That kind of arrangement has to work on both ends though. I'm willing to let the man who is not the biological father of my children take them to his home every other weekend and let them spend time with him and his new wife. Is this "psychotic" and abusive woman going to let you continue to see her son after you reach your limit and break it off with her? What effect do you think it will have on this poor kid when his mom tells you he isn't your kid, and you aren't allowed to see him anymore? What effect will that have on you, after you've bonded with him as father and son? What good are you really doing by staying and allowing the kid to watch his mom abuse you daily? You need to exit this situation as soon as possible. It is bad for everyone involved.

By  nider  |  19

Sometimes the hardest things to do are the most important things that need to be done. Relationships seem to have this way of multiplying that difficulty. I would encourage you to do the difficult thing before it becomes even harder.

By  thenewgirl29  |  20

If she is abusive towards you, I would have to wonder if her 5 year old is enduring the same thing? If so, I'd say get out of the relationship and look into ways of getting her help.

By  llamarrama01  |  21

Dump her while the kid is young. You're obviously not happy with her and it's not going to last. Older kids have a harder time adjusting to things like divorce or people they consider their parents leaving. Even though it may suck now, it won't be fair to the kid to wait until he's older.

  ViviMage  |  38

I was 4 when my parents started divorce, they were legally separated until dad had the money to divorce mom.
Even 4-6 is old enough to get upset.
3 and younger is better, the kid wouldn't recall him to miss.

By  CaroAurelia  |  12

I feel like she told him to do that. Either way, run. I hate to say it and I hope things work out better than I think they will, but if she's truly an abusive psycho, the effect of your leaving will probably be small potatoes compared to anything that woman puts that poor boy through. You need to leave.

  Jinxsie  |  27

But it is possible. I have a classmate who is also majoring in the same field as me(social work). She got custody of her ex-boyfriend's son even though she's not the real mother.

The environment was very toxic but she fought hard. If OP has a case like my classmate did then he can do it if he wants. :)