Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went to pull a nose hair out, only to end up pulling a spider out by its legs. FML
Today, I woke up bright and early… because a spider crawled into my ear. FML
Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML
Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML
Today, I got to experience the unadulterated horror of waking up to a spider crawling across my face. My screaming woke the neighbors. FML
Today, I was brushing my teeth when I looked up. There was a huge scorpion dangling on the air vent above my head. I was trapped in the bathroom for over an hour trying to build the courage to run out. FML
Today, I was going through my Facebook feed when I saw a post of a man being wheeled to the emergency room with a spider stuck in their ear. The post has me scared enough to want to sleep with earplugs. I'm a 37 year-old man. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML
Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML
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Top comments
Grenith 21
Hop on the nope train to fuckthatshitville.
devildog562 33
Did your spidy sense kick in ?
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Comments (103)
IndefiniteBeauty 17
Hahahaha! I would've gone back to sleep and tried to pretend it was a dream because nope. It's **** that shit o'clock. (The above is nervous laughter).
Garnetshaddow 30
I agree.... I really hate spiders....
scottyboy254 13
******* Australia
BaDumTsss_fml 23
Did you go because you didn't think you were ready to handle the responsibility of being Spider-Man?
NightHawk387 22
Wow, that's unbelievable. I didn't know Australia had spiders small enough to fit in your nasal cavity.
False_Stupidity 42
Sure we do, they aren't all huge, but it's the small ones that are often the dangerous ones!
abbyade 21
That is so messed up !
IvyChennyChen 21
only in Australia....
Georgia951 6
Well, you know the drill.... I'll get the fire, you prepare to be burned.... (it's for the best, trust me)
Mynamewontfi 40
I shouldn't have read this right before going to bed.
Futacy 30
And you live in Australia!? Oh god bless you.
pheonixxe 15
That is terrifying. I am so sorry.