Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went to pull a nose hair out, only to end up pulling a spider out by its legs. FML
Today, I woke up bright and early… because a spider crawled into my ear. FML
Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML
Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML
Today, I got to experience the unadulterated horror of waking up to a spider crawling across my face. My screaming woke the neighbors. FML
Today, I was brushing my teeth when I looked up. There was a huge scorpion dangling on the air vent above my head. I was trapped in the bathroom for over an hour trying to build the courage to run out. FML
Today, I was going through my Facebook feed when I saw a post of a man being wheeled to the emergency room with a spider stuck in their ear. The post has me scared enough to want to sleep with earplugs. I'm a 37 year-old man. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML
Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML
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Top comments
Grenith 21
Hop on the nope train to fuckthatshitville.
devildog562 33
Did your spidy sense kick in ?
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Comments (103)
aelitalyoko 14
meanwhile in australia.
WipeHour 11
nope
Lagalette 19
I feel you so much :') i've made the same kind of dream yesterday. It's terrible but when you wake up, it's amazing to realize that it was just a dream !
MiguelDavila 18
gross
tor415 4
I said the sharting during vows was the most qualifying FML I'd ever read... I spoke too soon. Congratulations, you're tied. That is horrifying
FitFriday 32
My worst nightmare
Clayton87 13
I'm pretty sure having a spider in your ear canal is worse.
biopilot17 9
**** u dammit now I can feel things in my nose :0
yolololol3 17
Are you spiderman?
bossymaggot 13
Well I won't be able to sleep tonight I hate spiders and agreed your life is ******
asilhouette 11
I looked at the location of this FML and it all made sense