Love: Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she... - FML

By nikto - 03/06/2011 01:01

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 037

You deserved it 3 955

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Same thing different taste

By Isitreallythatbad, - 22/12/2013 05:37 - United States

Today, I went to a local bar for a speed dating event. The first person I hooked up with took one look at my face, burst into laughter, and walked out of the bar practically doubling over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 527

You deserved it 3 646

By Aintnosunshine - 31/12/2008 03:48 - France

Today, I attended a speed dating evening. After 7 minutes, the girl told me she wasn't interested. I asked her at what point of the conversation she had made up her mind, she answered: "When you said 'Hello'. Goodbye". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 283

You deserved it 2 452

Dating pool hell

By AwkwardNotCute - 05/04/2022 19:00 - United States - Pomona

Today, I tried instant online video dating for the first time, after not having much luck on other dating sites. The first date was kind of awkward, and "ended" with a kind of fade out and I could hear her chatting with someone else. "Hella awkward." Fair enough. "But was he cute? - No." FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 05/11/2012 19:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "nope", and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 498

You deserved it 2 789

By well okay then - 20/05/2013 16:02 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 296

You deserved it 4 671

By Anonycunt - 27/07/2013 16:30 - Germany - Bonn

Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 312

You deserved it 4 001

By Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 996

You deserved it 2 645

Is this catfishing?

By Anonymous - 01/04/2023 06:00

Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 705

You deserved it 187

Tonight, on First Dates…

By James C - 18/04/2012 08:48 - United Kingdom - Stoke-on-trent

Today, I was on a first date. She asked what I do, so I replied, "I create adverts." She then yelled, "F**k you" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 294

You deserved it 4 605

By firstdate - 24/01/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, I was on my first date with my crush. When I saw her, I greeted her with, "Hey, sweetheart." She's convinced I said, "Hey, retard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 251

You deserved it 5 318

Next

Top comments

tigerkyle92 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:28

Don't worry she was probably checking out how obnoxiously huge your penis was.

perdix 29

Friday 3 June 2011 8:27

Whip out your iPhone and play Angry Birds for the remaining 7 minutes and 50 seconds. Then, await your next humiliation.

Comments

chippa 24

Friday 3 June 2011 8:21

I'm guessing you look like her last one-night-stand or something. Edit: Or her brother.

HugoBosss_fml 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:45

It's about time guys throw drinks in girls faces...

urdirtyolduncle 15

Friday 3 June 2011 17:28

OP should've said, "No, it's organic" ;)

RebornProblem 0

Wednesday 8 June 2011 21:15

Better drink my own piss.

Sulfur183 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:21

YDI for speed dating.

yak526 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:51

i read speed dating and thought ydi, why do people feel the need that they always have to be in a relationship

withgoldeneyes 5

Friday 3 June 2011 10:35

or maybe they just can't get a relationship and it's a last resort

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Friday 3 June 2011 14:43

I thought eharmony was the last resort

a_nutritionist 10

Sunday 5 June 2011 12:37

@19 and its bad to want to be in a relationship or meeting new people? from the sound of things, speed dating can be a fun social activity. hell, if im single again i may give it a crack, what have you got to lose? ...unless youre this guy.

Ldesu 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:21

Not exactly the first line you want to hear.

Spaghetti7 5

Friday 3 June 2011 14:13

i think an insult like that is just about equal to a slap.

mtlooney225 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:21

She was talking about your clothes. The colors clashed.

DeadxManxWalking 27

Friday 3 June 2011 11:20

another reason why I match when I dress lol. if not fully by colors then by a little theme.

blondebrunette11 4

Friday 3 June 2011 11:48

u know this how???

hahafylop 4

Friday 3 June 2011 14:30

That's why you are a blonde.

perdix 29

Friday 3 June 2011 8:27

Whip out your iPhone and play Angry Birds for the remaining 7 minutes and 50 seconds. Then, await your next humiliation.

bibit1990 2

Friday 3 June 2011 8:31

woo!!!! angry birds!!! :D

m0rgana 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:50

ANGRY BIRDS FTW!!!!!!!

fmlsaves 0

Friday 3 June 2011 9:58

bubble shooter is my most recent addiction along with words with friends

Mish44 3

Friday 3 June 2011 14:17

hahhaa love it!

BigOrca 2

Friday 3 June 2011 17:27

I agree. tell her she is not worth your time.

tigerkyle92 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:28

Don't worry she was probably checking out how obnoxiously huge your penis was.

mexicotoucher 7

Friday 3 June 2011 8:28

At least you didn't burst out crying

Soloman212 28

Friday 3 June 2011 8:29

The FML doesn't specify the contrary...

siege10 0

Friday 3 June 2011 17:22

it also didn't specify that he wasn't naked or have his shirt inside out. in fact it specified almost nothing. random assumptions are bad for your brain.

unclebunny 7

Thursday 16 August 2012 2:21

If OP is crying because some random girl said something to him while speed dating, he's too young.

ILoveEggnog 7

Friday 3 June 2011 8:34

Were you naked?

A7X_LoVeee 10

Friday 3 June 2011 18:02

No that's why it was awkward. DUH!

MarcyMarc 4

Friday 3 June 2011 8:34

so uh, how did that date go?

Livinia 11

Friday 3 June 2011 8:34

Geez, it's a wonder she's single.

Keywords

Work Awkward Parents Relatable Job interview Facebook Social Media Jealousy Love Relationship advice Friends AITA Kids Shoes Annoying Roommate Music Names Customers Education Capitalism Money Gamers Weird Bodyshaming Coworkers Landlords Allergies Dogs Singing

The Top

Today, my 58 year-old mother told me she’s having a baby. Apparently she hasn’t started menopause yet, but assumed from her age she wouldn’t get pregnant when she started seeing a man she goes to bingo with. 58 years-old. My little brother/sister is going to be 36 years younger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 82

Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 180

The Top

Today, I learned after weeks of waiting that my order of vinyl siding had been shipped to a contractor in another state, who installed it without realizing it was the wrong style and color. I would have to wait weeks for a new shipment, except the manufacturer has discontinued it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 704

You deserved it 161

Today, I was at the gym playing basketball. A very attractive girl chose me to be on her team. We were playing well and hitting it off. I had decided to ask for her number after the game, until I smashed the ball in her face, resulting in her having a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 370

You deserved it 3 442

Today, I was checking out my boyfriend's facebook profile. I saw that he had just taken the "How long will it take for your girldriend to realize you're cheating on her?" Quiz. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 359

You deserved it 5 777

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 415

You deserved it 7 598

Today, I had an important staff meeting via Zoom. My boyfriend got home from work, walked through the door and shouted, "BABE! I'M READY TO GET MY D*** SUCKED!" I wasn't on mute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 436

You deserved it 447

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 934

You deserved it 7 083