By great. - 02/01/2013 18:59

Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 962
You deserved it 3 555

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Aspen_Grace33 27

Gotta love people without the balls to just tell you when something is bothering them or just not working for them!


decidedlyvague 11

At least he didn't come out dragging a midget by the leg, nose covered in white powder, with his pants half down screaming "Irene why!!!!!! Why did you leave me!!!?!!????"

I'm happy I don't get that reference, whatever it's from sounds ****** up

Iniezian 18

This is an epic win despite the weirdness.

maybe he got murdered,try and quick to call him

decidedlyvague 11

A reference to what? I don't see a reference.

Aspen_Grace33 27

Gotta love people without the balls to just tell you when something is bothering them or just not working for them!

Sure the date might not work out but who leaves without eating?

23, it was during dinner so he probably ate at least part of his meal, but left her with the bill.

He could've just gone "I'm an actor, their all actors, and you are on MTV's disaster date!"

What a bitch. Does not sound like a man at all sounds like a boy. He needs to grow up.

perhaps he was a WANTED by FBI, did you get ready bolted with him?

LiterOfCola 16

What a asshole. I just don't get how you can be such an passive aggressive douche. ;)

almost there, finally the guy find out that he was totally a gay. dont cry baby, go get next one who is straight

Don't even sweat it, there are better guys out there.

Good riddance... Better than being in a relationship with him...

I guessed it? So a dinosaur did eat him on the way back?

I guessed that he came back wearing a purple dress with a blonde wig pretending to be a woman. I guess I was wrong.

No, no, no! You both got it wrong! You see, what had happened was, OP's date went to the bathroom, where he slipped and fell in a puddle of urine left on the floor by a one eyed man with poor aim. (You know, with his poor depth perception and all.) As he was lying on the floor, helpless and in agony with a broken leg, Gilderoy Lockhart happened upon him and stole his bones. Now a puddle himself, OP's date fell through a drain in the floor, where he landed deep in the sewer underworld, ruled by hideous mutants. There, the mutants took pity on him, and gave him a job as a rug in the lobby of their city hall. All was well until one day, the mutant city fell under attack from the City of the Blind, where the one eyed man was King--the same one eyed man who had sabotaged OP's date's romantic evening! "I shall have my revenge!" Shouted OP's date, as he threw himself at the feet of the one eyed man, who slipped, and fell into the putrid sewer water, where he died a particularly unpleasant drowning death. "Hooray!" cried the mutants, "OP's date has saved us!" as the City of the Blind soldiers retreated. They are stumbling through the mutant city in search of their home to this day. And, to this day, OP's date flies over the mutant city, as the flag of that proud mutant nation, the mutants ever thankful to their hero. And THAT is what happened. See, OP? Don't take things so personally.

My guess was that he was eaten by a grue.

mowmowlife 21

He got the happy puppy syndrome where he couldn't stop peeing for joy. He's probably really embarrassed right now

Or perhaps he was extremely constipated from excitement!

My mom did that once. The guy found her.

Wow...awkward. I can see it now... Guy: Hey you, you forgot to come back to the table! They just brought breadsticks! Mom: Oh yeah, thanks...

bugmenotmofo 34

That made me laugh. "I'll chase you till the end of time!".

70- That's actually pretty accurate. He comes to our house from time to time. I'm very careful about checking who's at the door now. ._.

I'm sorry OP but think on the bright side, at least you didn't get too serious yet. Dodged a bullet there. :D

I didn't guess it, but maybe he got a text from another girl who is a little less high maintenance and didn't need to be taken out to a fancy dinner for a first date.

pheebs314 17

It just says they ate, not that it was fancy. They could've been at Red Robin for all we know.

TxCountryBeauty 10

There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel like you're worth the fancy dinner date... Personally I'd rather meet up for a drink or do something fun. It puts less expectations on each other. Save the nice dinner for a later date

Well, he left for some reason. This is a one sided story.

TxCountryBeauty 10

Yea she could of been an ogre!

To be honest I think getting to know each other is the first thing a date should do so they don't wast there time and money trying to impress each other. Just be honest and be yourself.

Aren't ALL of these FMLs one sided? Going to an inexpensive restaurant is an easy way to spend some time together getting to know each other a little better. No matter where the "date" is I would think honesty should be expected. Why assume a dinner date would create an atmosphere of being someone you're not?

I was only guessing the reason of why he left. Maybe they set the date up from some online dating site, and she was pretty online, but was a lot uglier in person.

Maybe he was abducted by aliens in the bathroom...

Come on, he didn't have to ditch her in the middle of dinner and stick her with the bill! That's just rude. I hope this gets out in OP's social circle as a warning not to date this guy 'cause he might just ditch you.

CharresBarkrey 15

Jesus, YooEfO, you are incredibly negative.

Well when it comes to girls. I been through a lot of bitches. So I put myself in his situation and assume there was a good reason why he did that.

perdix 29

Maybe he fell in . . . or maybe he crapped his pants and decided to hide in the bathroom until you leave. Nevertheless, you have two meals to eat. Chow down, champ!

Yeah I was thinking possibly shit himself. You don't come back from that one. Or heroin overdose in the stall. He is probably on the can right now with a rubber tube wrapped around his arm.