Today, I went on a first date. He got so drunk he forgot what he ordered to eat ten minutes after ordering. He also had to text me later to ask if we kissed, because he couldn’t remember. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML
Today, I was on a first date and tried to playfully flick a fry at him. It missed, hit a waiter in the face, and he dropped an entire tray of drinks onto an elderly couple. My date laughed, then excused himself to the bathroom… and never came back. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Everything was going great until I laughed so hard at one of his jokes that I snorted, choked on my drink, and accidentally slapped his face while trying to cover my mouth. We didn't order dessert. FML
Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML
Today, I went to get drinks for the first time with a guy I'd been talking to. He drank 4 drinks in the span of 30 minutes, and fell asleep at the table. I went to the bathroom before getting the check, and I came back to find he'd thrown up all over our table. Needless to say, I left without saying a word to him and deleted his number. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Not only I had already been on a date with the guy before, we'd also had both forgotten about it until halfway through the dinner. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
Today, I went on my first date in months. It was going well until the waiter brought our drinks. I went to take a sip of my cocktail, but I misjudged the size of the glass and the stupid paper straw, and spilled it all over myself. The waiter said, “Well, at least it’s not a first date curse,” and I replied, “Oh, it definitely is.” It was, because I doubt I'll be seeing her again. FML
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Top comments
cuz803 46
Libation at his finest. Pure keeper! Seriously though, get someone else who's more responsible with drinking.
RichardPencil 32
Marry him! The ability to forget is the most important skill needed for a successful marriage. Even more important than the ability to forgive. With such a poor memory, he'll be easy to gaslight.
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Comments (4)
cuz803 46
Libation at his finest. Pure keeper! Seriously though, get someone else who's more responsible with drinking.
Chazzster 32
Sadly, especially with young adults, sometimes one may lean too heavily on alcohol to get them to feel confident and comfortable in a stressful situation like a first date. But as you saw, overdoing the alcohol consumption is a big problem… Consider this - If you met them in a bar they are a drinker and might have a problem with that. If you met them online and their first suggestion for a place to go or meet was a bar then likewise they could be a problem drinker… Alcohol in moderation is generally fine (unless the person is an alcoholic and they won’t stop there) - It’s when the person goes overboard that it becomes a problem. And of course don’t drink (or get high) and then drive (or ride with a drunk driver) - That can easily become a huge, life ruining problem. And by the way, if a person regularly drinks a lot of alcohol then they may be an alcoholic and that’s a huge red flag to stay away from… OP almost everyone has had a shitty date - It’s part of the dating lottery. But learn from the experiences what signs to avoid. And avoid being that person yourself too. I suggest a coffee shop as a nice place to meet on a first date - or a movie.
RichardPencil 32
Marry him! The ability to forget is the most important skill needed for a successful marriage. Even more important than the ability to forgive. With such a poor memory, he'll be easy to gaslight.
JackWood 21
He was probably just nervous at your intimidating beauty and intelligence. You should give him another chance.