Miscellaneous: Today, I was watching a movie online. There was a 15 minute ad....

By popcorn - 27/04/2011 18:33 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie online. There was a 15 minute ad. 13 minutes into watching an ad about birth control, I noticed that there was a "skip this ad" button in the corner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 764

You deserved it 53 189

Miscellaneous

Vulture

Compromises

Cognitive dissonance

By life sucks - 20/05/2010 05:12 - United States

Today, I learned my boyfriend has another girlfriend. His excuse is he's bipolar and each of his personalities needs a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 706

You deserved it 5 069

By duh - 27/01/2009 08:10 - United States

Today, I sang the itsy bitsy spider song with a class of thirty 20 somethings because we're going to be kindergarten teachers. She made us do the hand motions too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 266

You deserved it 26 774

By shilpajayseanfan - 24/02/2009 13:43 - Canada

Today, I drove into my school. Literally drove into my school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 215

You deserved it 54 481

By Anonymous - 28/09/2013 16:25 - Serbia - Beograd

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 665

You deserved it 4 368

By CA19oo - 20/03/2012 01:03 - United States - Buford

Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 679

You deserved it 2 062

By m0m - 04/03/2016 14:01 - Belgium - Brasschaat

Today, I had to explain to my 27 year-old sister why a stainless steel fork isn't a good toy for my 8 month-old baby. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 981

You deserved it 1 655

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 17:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 636

You deserved it 1 293

By Anonymous - 11/05/2009 06:21 - United States

Today, I called my mom while she was out of town and confessed how I have been depressed lately and thinking suicidal thoughts. After my long sob story, she took a breath and said, "OK, just make sure you don't forget to take the dogs out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 630

You deserved it 5 673

By WatchOut - 16/08/2013 16:04 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I submitted my big assignment to my teacher at 1:55pm. The deadline was 2pm. She rejected it, because her watch read a few minutes after 2pm, and she maintains that the time on her watch is the "real" time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 774

You deserved it 13 037

By GatorBoi - 04/07/2016 17:59 - United States

Today, I had to awkwardly sit next to my ex and her mother on a 2-hour flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 419

You deserved it 2 274

By sam - 02/05/2010 00:12 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to do something fun and spontaneous, so we had sex in the disabled toilet in the shopping centre. Little did we know, the male AND female toilets were conveniently being cleaned at the time, so the only toilet open was the disabled one. Walk of shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 255

You deserved it 47 416

By Tucker - 18/11/2009 21:35 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 357

You deserved it 8 740

By Duplighost - 12/01/2012 20:16 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's Marine dad walked in on us fooling around naked. Now we can only hang out with "parental supervision". Oh, and I have to record my visits on a clipboard by the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 726

You deserved it 39 985

By Dirtisgood - 24/08/2018 00:00

Today, my in-laws told me, in all seriousness, that my child was going to become paralyzed because I let him play on grass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 996

You deserved it 153

By DogBeater - 21/06/2016 01:21 - United States

Today, I've just moved into a new apartment. It's also the day my big baby of a dog stepped on a rock and began yelping when I tried to touch his paw. He "suddenly" felt better after I carried him inside. Now everyone thinks I'm beating my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 967

You deserved it 830

By hannahk267 - 18/11/2011 13:30 - United States

Today, I was practicing my lines for theater class in the hall. My partner and I chose a script where we argue over me stealing her boyfriend. Since it started to sound like a real argument, another student said that I was a "crazy bitch" and punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 919

You deserved it 4 381

Cleanliness is next to someone else

By Anonymous - 10/03/2020 15:00

Today, we got new seats in my English class; I was seated next to a boy that I don't know very well. When I sat down, he informed me that he is "opposed" to brushing his teeth. I thought he was kidding. Then he started breathing with his mouth open. These are our seats for the rest of the year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 710

You deserved it 98

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 22:24 - Canada - Sackville

Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 932

You deserved it 1 993

By Cecilly2010 - 28/04/2011 15:53

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 541

You deserved it 5 222

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 23:16 - United Kingdom

Today, wanting to break up with my boyfriend, I invited him to dinner with my parents. I was sure they'd hate him, which would give me the excuse I needed. They ended up loving him, and now they won't stop mentioning marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 698

You deserved it 52 952

By steven - 24/06/2009 15:33 - Canada

Today, my friend said he'd give me 20 bucks if I would ask out the ugliest girl in school. I did it. She rejected me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 958

You deserved it 112 385

By 50love - 13/12/2011 05:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. After he did, he walked over to his friends. I saw him tell them that he broke up with me. After he finished all of them cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 867

You deserved it 8 094

By coughcough - 14/07/2013 05:35 - United States

Today, after recovering from pneumonia and a severe asthma attack caused by my dad's fiancée's cat, he chose to keep the cat. I can't go to his house without having to go to the hospital later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 050

You deserved it 4 022

By BannedfromFriend - 20/05/2015 23:21 - United States

Today, I was at my best friend's house, listening to him complain about his mother remembering all the bad stuff he did when he was in high school. I jokingly said, "An elephant never forgets." Guess who was behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 783

You deserved it 10 877

Plooped

By ZombieMommy - 10/03/2017 05:00 - United States - Conroe

Today, I was pouring milk into my coffee and, as it plooped into my mug, I noticed the expiration date on the jug passed 2 weeks ago. Nobody here drinks milk very often and I ran out of creamer so I've been unknowingly drinking my coffee with curdled milk for the past 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 276

You deserved it 2 275

By Anonymous - 29/06/2019 16:16 - United States - Winston Salem

Today, my coworker and I were discussing our office's lack of break room, and how we should suggest a picnic table for our upcoming landscaping. We concluded that someone would let their dog steal our lunches if we ate outside. Working at the vet's sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 320

You deserved it 221

By Anonymous - 17/06/2017 22:00 - United States - Holland

Today, after an argument, my boyfriend called me a fart knocker and gave me a wedgie. Apparently, I'm dating an 10-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 523

You deserved it 1 022

By Levi2411 - 21/11/2018 17:30

Today, I jokingly told my mother to "go fall down a hole" during a mock argument we always have. Not even 10 minutes later, our basement stairs gave out. When I said that, I didn't want her to break both her arms or to actually fall into a gaping hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 760

You deserved it 437

By Ouchies - 09/02/2012 17:28 - United States

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 312

You deserved it 2 245

By Anonymous - 01/08/2011 04:28 - United States

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 102

You deserved it 5 758

Communication breakdown

By Jen - 20/03/2012 05:11 - United States - Woodland Hills

Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 821

You deserved it 7 243

By Anonymous - 08/05/2016 08:42

Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 720

You deserved it 2 643

By Anonymous - 17/08/2015 08:33 - United States

Today, after hearing the doctor saying my girlfriend can never be pregnant, I got a bit too excited. I'm currently on the 5th hour of the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 655

You deserved it 42 670

By Anonymous - 02/12/2012 08:19 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 698

You deserved it 12 045

By It's a foot long - 03/09/2018 03:30

Today, I have to figure out how to tell my vision-impaired father that his ex-girlfriend left their double pronged dildo out on his dresser when she moved out. I see it when I bring him his coffee every morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 131

You deserved it 356

By Someguy - 06/06/2011 18:55 - Belgium

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to declare my love to the girl I have a crush on. I guess I shouldn't have gone and kissed her without warning, because now my face is covered with slap marks, and I had to explain myself at the police station for sexual harassement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 846

You deserved it 56 848

By SayCheese - 02/04/2013 22:52 - Canada - Prince George

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 957

You deserved it 72 163

By alejandro38 - 11/07/2010 14:44 - United States

Today, I had an interview. I didn't get the job because apparently customers might not understand me, since I "talk too good." I just graduated with an English degree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 229

You deserved it 3 475

By wellthisisawkward80 - 06/11/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 555

You deserved it 17 916

Skinny girl

By mortifying - 28/10/2019 20:00 - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, I started playing footsie with the girl I like next to me in Biology. Turns out it was the table leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 1 839

Add a comment - Reply to : #

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

Fx13mz 7

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:42

And while you're at home watching that movie, there's a couple out there using that birth control.

Kawboy 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:41

must have been interesting

Eggers 2

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:40

Okay? we care why?

Eggers 2

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:47

My comment was too logical for FML

insidejokeswithm 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:26

PMS much?

Kawboy 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:41

must have been interesting

ceinaworus 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:20

I think that the OP is easily captivated by ads...

Melvar_10 3

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:27

would be more interesting in space

littlemissFYL 5

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 2:17

very interesting indeed, #1. what kind of ad is more than 13 minutes long? the fuck?

DoubleDose 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 2:54

here's my following plan. Sue the site for not making the skip button large enough for us ADD sufferers. I swear if I had a gun pointed to my head I would still notice a butterfly flying by.

Michelle_74617 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:42

Wow you are so stupid. FAIL

whitesox365 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:04

hey! you watch it! op wasted 13 WHOLE minutes watching that ad!

Kawboy 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:09

I'll agree but I bet op knows alot about that particular birth control lol

Fx13mz 7

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:42

And while you're at home watching that movie, there's a couple out there using that birth control.

insidejokeswithm 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:43

I hate that when that happens! I do that all the time with YouTube videos.

Michelle_74617 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:44

Oh yeah and what did you learn from that

kellbelle032398 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:44

ummm thats def not FML. a whole 13 minutes of your lifeu wont get back. big deal. and maybe stop watching illegal movies online..?

SnailJamsss 6

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:47

Hahaha. I've done that before. It happens.

Death_From_Above 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 1:11

........ I got nothin for that.....

Pizzamaster 0

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:48

YouTube does that to me all the time. and those ads always pop up during important shit. amiright?

KeyOfTheTwilight 1

Send a private message

Thursday 28 April 2011 0:48

Cut the OP some slack. They probably thought it was an ad for the movie "Grizzly Man" After 13 minutes they figured it was the wrong movie but kept waiting. Cause that's the thing about bear attacks... they come when you least expect it.