Today, I was walking with my girlfriend when a little guy walked up and flirted with her. I'm a pretty weak guy and he looked weaker, so I gave him a little push and said "Back off". He's actually not weak at all. I've got a black eye and a girlfriend who won't stop laughing to prove it. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend actually walked into a door and gave herself a black eye. She's too embarrassed to admit it, so she's telling everyone I beat her. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I hit her. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML
Today, I was walking my girlfriend to class when my friend came by and playfully punched me in the arm. Trying not to look like a wimp, I turned around to hit him in the arm. Instead, I ended up punching a girl in the face. Now my girlfriend won't talk to me and I'm suspended. FML
Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
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Top comments
kurukururock 0
What's your problem? You should be flattered that another guy wants to flirt with your girlfriend, she must be attractive. If he was touching her or something, yeah, I would've gotten angry and probably told him to back off too. But that was really uncalled for, and YDI.
dave202 0
wow you need to lighten up, not every guy who talks to your girlfriend wants to take her from you.
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Comments (117)
KBmaster 0
dude that was meesed up YDI and the way you stated this it's sounds like you got beat up by a midget btw guys i learned the heard way that a girl is not impressed when you act mean to them, beat up other guys, or if you have a big baby maker
KBmaster 0
number 's 1 comment i agree if you love your girl you should be bulking up to be ready to protect them
KillaKingPerrie 4
HAHAHAHAHA this why you eat your veggies and get good sleep kids. Otherwise you get your ass kicked by circus midgets.
FerrariCake 2
The term "midget" is insensitive, rude and offensive. The preferred term for people of very short stature is "munchkin".
DameGreyWulf 1
Pushing was unnecessary.
satanstoystore 0
wtf? unless he touches you or the gf you dont get to touch him. youre not in the playground anymore.
ravenscorne 0
Well at least you tried. Your girlfriend shoulda given you a break, I mean I'd love it if my guy stands up for me. Even if he fails at it, it's the thought that counts.
PuhPuhPuhPi 0
You don't pick a fight with a short guy. The shorter a guy is, the shorter his temper. It's pretty much a proven fact.
emilygirl14 0
Wow. Dickwad central. Until you have any ******* idea what it's like to have a boyfriend who won't stick up for you, and doesn't give a shit about you, you don't have room to talk. (posters) OP, your girlfriend is a bitch, and if she really truly loved you, she wouldn't be able to watch you get hurt and laugh about it. Dump her. Find someone who appreciates you, and instead of turning to FML posters after an event like that, talk to someone who ACTUALLY knows jack shit about relationships.
palmtrees 1
He wasn't "standing up" for her, he was being possessive of her. Nowhere in there does it say this other guy was harassing her or bothering her in any way, in which case the OP's actions would be more understandable because he would be standing up for her. Instead, he was just being a bitch because some other guy came over to talk to her and he felt insecure.
TheRealStunts 27
The guy was FLIRTING with his girlfriend while he was right next to her....
DeathByIrony90 0
watch the movie "Snatch"; not only is it a bad-ass movie, but there's a bare-knuckle boxer (played by Brad Pitt) who knocks out fellows a hundred pounds bigger than he is in one punch! As people have said earlier, fighting, like most sports, is mostly about technique-the muscles come second. And if a girl doesn't like you for your (small) size, don't waste your time.