hah! stab urself with a knife and say she did it :p that'll teach her!!!

you should hit her so her story is believable but just make sure it's the one with the black eye don't want her looking like a raccoon!

I agree with both number 8 and 9 yet u should make her pay in another way too..,

kick her ass for lying.

Domestic Violence!!! Jersey Shore FTW!!!

Let the thread-jacking begin... But yea sucks OP but rather funny ;)

hahahahahah! # 1 win! I <3 jersey shore! fist pumping like champs ;)

i hope u beat her with your dick evvery night cuz a healthy sex life makes for a better realationship. but seriously. i would tell her to go walk into another door cuz it would be an improvement

Wow smartie! She's a keeper!

...so wen u gonna be on judge judy? dafp -__-

Punch her other eye as hard as you can. Then she'll match and she won't have to lie anymore. It's a win-win.

I've never really seen someone run into a door and get a black eye. I thought that was only on tv :P

give her another one... she needs a nice pair of irish sunglasses

lmao #1 FTW

I can't even begin to explain how stupid this is. I don't see why the hell she can't just take the blame. it was an accident and it's not like she is safe from her stupidity now...if u run into a door, chances are you will prolly do something else like that in your lifetime. I take the credit when I screw up like that because EVERYONE does that stuff

I agree with 54. OP you have a stupid gf

Get a new girlfriend before she hurts herself again and someone calls the police on you.

beat her for lying

8 I agree!!!!

wow

I see a lot of blonde jokes coming.... 2 blondes walk into a bar, they got knocked up.

Please tell me your joking. That's the stupidest thing I ever heard!!! How in the world is he going to tell them of he's dead GENIUS?

Hahahaha that's a good idea! This is the funniest FML ever.

I know!! That's the worst excuse ever. Now everyone else will look at OP like a bad person

I have a better solution next time they have sex he should just stick it up her ass and not be gentle

agreed with #75. she deserves that after that.

also agreed. perfect idea.

Bucking bronco?

^win

Most likely no one will believe it, they always take the woman's if they don't know the full story.