Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone, when I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart. He swore at me for being a pig, hung up, and has ignored all my subsequent calls. I try not to date idiots, but it's like I have a big old shithead-attracting magnet attached to me or something. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, while on a date with an amazing guy, I burped. He called me a disgusting pig and immediately left. I have burped a total of three times in my life and have therefore never learned how to control it. FML
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML
Today, after an argument, my boyfriend called me a fart knocker and gave me a wedgie. Apparently, I'm dating an 10-year-old. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML
Today, my girlfriend let out a vile fart in an Uber. It stank so bad, the driver threatened to kick us out. She blamed it on me and called me a pig. Then, she ripped another one, and he actually did kick us out. She had the nerve to act hurt when I called a second Uber only for myself. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ilovesuju 10
the fart fmls are always the funniest
SandiRainbowFish 20
Wow, like he never farts. What an ass. You deserve better, OP!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (200)
snafu63 0
let me get this straight, he's an idiot for thinking you're a pig for farting? seems like you might be just as big of an idiot.
vanaathiel 13
Because you've never farted in your life, of course.
jaakerzz 6
We all know that girls don't fart, what is this?
Pigeon89 34
I know! I'm a girl and I've never farted- must be a troll the moderators let through :(
Zachthejoker 10
Your boyfriend sounds like a little bitch
baddawg365 0
147- *bows low* Thank you madam
Jirekianu2 19
He freaked out that bad over a fart? What a pussy.
SimpleGr33n 4
Never do that unless you guys are good couple or have been dating for a while a lot of dudes don't like it but I tease my GF about that's as far as I go.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I hope you dumped his hypocritical, judgmental ass. What a puss. And also, maybe you should raise the bar when it comes to guys you date if that's the only type you've been getting.
oiendoio 1
uhh your an idiot if you think for a moment that you can "accidentally" rip the "loudest" fart, your also ******* an idiot if you think we dont know if your BF ripped a rank ass fart mid conversation you wouldnt act like a deranged ****.
minniedorkie 3
Your the one that farted
wolfgirl18 3
Seriously! I hate when people make a big deal about that. Although gross it happens to everyone and on a regular basis if he's that much of an ass he doesn't deserve you at all. You will find some better but FYL :/