Animals: Today, I was riding my bike and swerved to avoid hitting a lizard....

By Anonymous - 17/07/2011 20:44 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike and swerved to avoid hitting a lizard. I ended up sliding into a bush and skinning myself, only to find my tires had still managed to cut the lizard to pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 635

You deserved it 8 870

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Same thing different taste

By Broderick - 26/03/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 074

You deserved it 6 961

By Kira - 24/04/2015 17:09 - Canada - Halifax

Today, I was spending some time alone out in the countryside, when I glanced at my boot. I saw a snake, screamed, ran like hell for my car, tripped over my own feet, and smashed my kneecaps. Upon further inspection, I realized the "snake" was my loose shoelace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 922

You deserved it 13 578

By jodulieu - 02/09/2010 02:31 - France

Today, I fell off my bike. I grazed my knee, shin, thigh, hip, collar bone, shoulder and face. I also strained my wrist. As I was wheeling my bike away, I stung my other leg on nettles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 645

You deserved it 4 453

By magicman - 04/07/2012 09:04 - United States

Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 162

You deserved it 31 439

By cycler - 13/06/2011 04:22 - United States

Today, I ran over a chipmunk. On my bike. Its mangled carcass got caught in the spokes and decided to join me on my ride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 961

You deserved it 12 633

Adding insult to injury

By Shibs - 13/10/2015 16:55 - Australia - Hurstville

Today, I was riding my bike along a road and a deer jumped out from the tree line, knocking me to the ground and breaking my arm. Someone pulled over to see if I was alright, running over my bike in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 419

You deserved it 1 787

By Anonymous - 31/08/2014 17:51 - United States

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 514

You deserved it 3 876

Pile on

By turtle - 12/07/2011 13:26 - United States

Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 615

You deserved it 12 684

By Anonymous - 14/09/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was chopping weeds with a weed whacker. I heard something get caught in the blades, and realized it was a frog when the leg hit me in the eye. The rest of the chopped frog ended up on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 241

You deserved it 5 505

By anonymous - 25/06/2016 20:03 - United States - Lowell

Today, I was taking a hike through the Appalachians. I lost my balance in a steep area, and grabbed for a root along the trail above me. It turned to not be a root, but a large, angry snake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 535

You deserved it 947

howslife123 0

Monday 18 July 2011 0:26

F the lizards life!!

Tyler12108 0

Monday 18 July 2011 0:26

poor lizard :'(

Comments

sarah_loves_yuh 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:02

Atleast you tried

isaac713 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:18

its the thought that counts? ):

meghanxelle 4

Monday 18 July 2011 4:19

aww:( you were just trying to help FYL haha

rolltidekid7 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:39

im the exact opposite i would try to run it over:))

properbostonian 5

Monday 18 July 2011 4:47

I love animals but I don't know why people risk life and limb for an animal dumb enough to be in the road when it can see or hear you approaching

GamerMatt97 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:55

R.I.P RANGO hey @ least u tried

chameleon724 8

Monday 18 July 2011 4:59

Awwwww poor lizard!! :P

Tonyjb09 0

Monday 18 July 2011 4:59

no not rango

jrmelon91 4

Monday 18 July 2011 5:12

Learn how to ride a bike, you ******* loser.

haydenbro03 4

Monday 18 July 2011 5:17

maybe his family could save 15% or more on his 15 minute funeral?

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Today, my girlfriend won’t give me oral because she doesn't like pubes, so I trimmed them; she refused again because they felt prickly, so I waxed them. Now she says I look like a little boy. If she doesn’t want to suck cock, why won’t she just say so instead of hinting she might if I shaved? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 383

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Today, I'd planned a DIY 'treat yourself' spa day at home. I put on a face mask and settled to relax in a bubble bath. Just as I was getting out of the tub, I slipped on the wet floor and crashed into the wall, leaving a perfect imprint of the face mask on the tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 127

Today, I was messaging a new friend when she mentioned her dad was cooking dinner that night. I jokingly texted, “Oh no! I’m sorry!” Turns out her dad is a professional chef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 1 197

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 693

You deserved it 46 119

Today, the person who I've asked to back off is still messaging me and making me more stressed out. I'm pretty sure he fancies me, but I'm asexual. This after he already promised to back off multiple times. I think I've got myself a stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 231

Today, my dad wanted to show me a cool camera he saw on Amazon yesterday, so I let him use my laptop to find it. I realized too late that I'd forgotten to clear my browsing history. The suggested purchases section was filled with dildos and lube. He definitely noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 756

You deserved it 8 891

Today, my son joined the ranks of an organisation filled with nothing but scum, villains, thieves, and highwaymen. He's now a tax inspector. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 844

Same thing different taste

Adding insult to injury

Pile on

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