Today, I was on a first date at a bar, when a girl walks over and ask me if I'm a doctor. I said yes, thinking she overheard me talking about my PhD. The girl then showed me a lump on her breast and asked what to do about it. My date then slapped me and left. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I asked my doctor out on a date. He had his nurse turn me down. FML
Tonight, on First Dates…
Today, I was on a first date. She asked what I do, so I replied, "I create adverts." She then yelled, "F**k you" and left. FML
Today, while at the gym, I started flirting with a hot doctor. I thought things were going well so I suggested we work out together sometime and maybe work our way up to dinner together, to which she replied, "Sorry but I've seen tumors bigger than your biceps," and then walked out. FML
Wait, what?
Today, I was out on a dinner date when suddenly a girl walks up to us and says to my date, "Girl, you can do so much better." Hearing this, my date looks at me, nods, gets up and walks off. I still had to pay for everything. FML
Negging
Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML
Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML
Today, I was eating lunch on my first date with a really pretty girl, when my ex shows up at the same restaurant and starts telling her how bad of a boyfriend I was. My date left. FML
Been there, done that
Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML
Paranoid
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Top comments
Mynamewontfi 40
Why would your date blame you, though? Unless you lifted up her shirt, it wasn't your fault.
cocacola999 27
At least you dodged a bullet with your first date. Slapping was incredibly illogical.
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Comments (40)
ViviMage 40
My fiancé has a Ph.D in retrovirology and epigenetics. He wouldn't know what to do about a breast lump either! Ph.Ds are not the same things as MDs people! And why is it ok to whip out a breast in public?? Oh, it's a bar. That makes total drunken sense now!
Zebediabolical 45
Because it's just a breast. If it's ok for a man to go topless why shouldn't it be ok for a woman to do the same?
species4872 20
Simple because a man topless has long been accepted and expected and does not cause in most women the same effects as a topless woman would cause in some men. It is a simple fact that the most undesirable, selfish, sleazy, depraved individuals with little self control who act without thought are men. You ladies must protect yourselves. Equality doesn't enter into it.
DoomedGemini 38
I wouldn't say it doesn't cause the same reaction.. It's just common rather than a secret. I've seen plenty of women practically drool over a shirtless guy. And your last comment also contributes. Instead of demanding self control and respect, many people seem to shrug things off as "boys will be boys".
Calingaladha 21
I'm guessing breast lumps aren't your areola of expertise? But that reaction from your date was over-the-top.
Beautymarked 12
Your date sounded grade A retarded. Hope you find a better one.
AverageAvarice 23
The only thing that could have been said to that woman is she needs to go to her General Practioner so he can check the lump and recommend her for a biopsy. But these things happen all the time, especially in the hospital hallway. People just try to show you their crevices. "Doctor I have this weird rash under my right butt cheek, is it herpes?", "Here just touch it." Stop it. Please. I feel bad if your not even an M.D. or D.O. who is used to the sight and smells.
westernmd 6
well did you touch the boobs at least and if so is that why she slapped you?
emo_tech 5
You picked your profession of being a doctor thus you deserve it.
Saraishi 25
PhD is not the same as MD though...
Zebediabolical 45
Talk about taking the bail-out call to the next level... THE BAIL OUT BOOB!
Saluriel 12
Your date was an idiot. You dodged a bullet there.
species4872 20
You walked, ran, into that one.