Today, I was observing a children's class as a part of a training... - FML

By future teacher - 9/7/2015 06:21 - Paraguay - Fernando De La Mora

Today, I was observing a children's class as a part of a training program. The teacher asked me to take one kid to the nurse's office because she wasn't feeling well. As soon as we step outside, I slip and fall down, taking the little girl with me. FML

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KoBabe

Fashion Police

Not a cheating!

By kkkk - 31/1/2011 15:44

Today, the company I applied for called up congratulating me in getting the job. I was ecstatic. Quickly enough I texted a few mates that I'd got the job. Twenty minutes later they called again saying the trainee had accidentally called the wrong applicant. FML

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By bankergirl - 16/1/2010 07:22 - United States

Today, I got called into work and I was really excited to earn some extra money. One block from getting there I get pulled over. Apparently my tags were expired, and there goes half a weeks pay. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

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By voltronn - 23/1/2010 05:04 - France

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend about having plans on tonight so he'd think I had a life outside of him. All my "friends" are going to a party. I'm not invited. FML

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By Anonymous - 26/9/2014 21:07 - United States - Pensacola

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

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By Sleepy - 9/10/2014 14:10 - United Kingdom - Hayes

Today, I fell asleep at my desk. It's bad enough that it was for 45 minutes and that I was snoring. What makes it worse? My boss woke me up. FML

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By Fire0fisis - 23/5/2012 09:38 - Hong Kong

Today, my boyfriend and I went out on his boat. We got in the water and started to have sex when a fishing boat came by and chummed. There's nothing more romantic than bloody fish guts. FML

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By Jakeok - 14/11/2014 00:04 - United States - Fraser

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

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By Anonymous - 8/9/2012 17:27 - United States - Sandy

Today, I got into an argument with my mom over her sexist, emotionally-abusive boyfriend. I told her that either he goes or I go. She called me a disrespectful bastard for not respecting my "new father." I'm now sitting outside a McDonald's with my suitcase, leeching their WiFi. FML

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By rindawg - 20/1/2009 03:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend took me out to a nice seafood dinner where we had some great crab legs. Later tonight we drove down to the beach and started messing around. He started touching me... with his hands still covered in salty crab juice. FML

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By ygma - 1/12/2015 16:39 - United States - Mansfield

Today, my extremely religious grandmother disowned me for watching Supernatural. FML

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By Miscellaneous - 17/6/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went in for an interview with a firm where I'd done some interning before. After shaking hands with both the directors, I went to shake hands with one of the director's wives, who also works there. Turns out she was going for a hug and kiss on the cheek. I ended up kissing her on the lips. FML

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By Saraitkddh - 6/10/2018 05:00

Today, my friend told me that my brother sent her a picture of his dick. How did she tell me this? By sending me the picture. FML

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By Anonymous - 23/8/2009 11:00 - Norway

Today, I was outside with a guy I really like. He asked me to lay down on the ground and watch the stars with him. I did. Suddenly, he got up, walked over to another girl and kissed her. They left me there on the soaking wet ground, watching the stars. FML

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By chuchie - 12/6/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my 5 month old nephew who hasn't pooped in 2 days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolls over and pees on my new carpet. I roll him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML

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By Anonymous - 1/2/2018 19:00

Today, because I left my wallet at home, I got arrested for "underage smoking." I'm 32 years old. FML

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By Anonymous - 7/10/2019 22:00

Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo

Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML

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By Forgotten One - 15/10/2009 11:11 - France

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years decided to start an online blog about his life. He mentioned his cars, his friends and even his staff. I was never mentioned. FML

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By "lildale92" - 5/11/2019 02:00

So cute

Today, my youngest decided my phone needed a bath in the toilet. FML

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By Anonymous - 23/9/2020 23:01 - United States - Waldwick

Facebook Science

Today, I was going to hang out with my crush and tell him how I felt, but he cancelled because I had COVID 5 months ago and his mom is afraid I’m contagious. I’m safer to hang out with because I now have antibodies and can’t transmit it. I’ve also had 4 negative tests since then. FML

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By Shell - 5/3/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/5/2019 16:07

Greased Lightning

Today, I got home from working at KFC and hopped straight into the shower. I could see that the water was being tinged yellow by the grease that had got plastered on me at work and was now coming off, so I started gagging and almost threw up. FML

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By furryfriend - 16/9/2014 18:46 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was home sick and playing with my dog. I suddenly felt the urge to throw up, so I sprinted to the bathroom. My dog thought this was an invitation to chase me and tackle me to the floor. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/1/2016 01:46 - United States - Encino

Today, a friend told me that when I read, I make all the expressions the characters in the book are making. Apparently, I have been doing this since I was a kid, and no one ever told me. FML

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By Anonymous - 5/11/2011 01:21 - United States

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

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By whymyliferose - 3/6/2011 04:47 - United States

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

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By banana2894 - 10/8/2012 04:40 - United States - Eugene

Today, I looked over at the car parked next to me and noticed a very large woman plucking her mustache. She locked eyes with me and kept plucking. After that, every time I looked over, she was still staring. Staring and plucking. Now when I close my eyes, I can still see her. FML

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By FailedEngineer - 20/10/2009 21:31 - Australia

Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML

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By shat - 12/12/2015 07:14 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML

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By rolled - 27/1/2018 01:30

Today, my angry ex-girlfriend ordered a bong to my house in my name. I came home to my parents screaming at me, demanding to know where "the weed" was. FML

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By why - 4/10/2018 07:30 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend convinced my current boyfriend to break up with me because "bros before hoes". They met for the first time last week. FML

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By sheisselluv - 11/5/2014 20:30 - Germany - Gera

Today, was my first day of work in my life. I was excited, and so was my dad, who saw me to the door and ruffled my hair as he wished me luck. I didn't notice until half an hour after arriving at work that he'd stuck his gum in my hair. Nobody bothered to tell me. FML

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By munnyfish - 7/11/2009 07:16 - Canada

Today, as I was waking up, I let out a huge morning fart. When I open my eyes, I realized that I was crashing at a friends place with four other people. Yep, they all heard. FML

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By sad - 26/2/2010 19:17 - United States

Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML

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By Tired Hungry Geek - 27/10/2015 04:40 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after a long day at work and didn't feel like cooking so I went to a drive thru. I placed my order, went to the window and paid. I then drove off without my food and didn't realize it for a couple of blocks. I was too embarrassed to go back and get it. FML

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By anonymous - 2/4/2016 04:11 - United States - Westminster

Today, my sister still refuses to pay back all the money she owes me because she once bought me something from the dollar menu at McDonald's. FML

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By alliobamy - 28/9/2009 04:09 - United States

Today, I found an old friend of mine on Facebook. After adding her, I suggested friends for her. She ended up adding every single one I added, but not me. I later saw her ask one of those friends who the hell I was and how I knew all of them. We used to eat lunch together everyday. FML

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By roadkill - 28/2/2011 15:50 - United States

Today, an old lady hit me with her car. After which she says, "Oh! Not Again!" FML

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By secretdeo - 24/8/2009 04:48 - United States

Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML

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By herANDi - 3/4/2009 06:10 - Canada

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I'm already a clumsy person but became extra clumsy because I was nervous. After knocking over my drink for the fourth time, my boyfriend's mom angrily shouted "Did you actually come drunk for the first time meeting us?" FML

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Top comments

By youngmessi252525 | 20

#6345476 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:59

You aren't supposed to let the children down

By jakers8424 | 18

#6345483 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:03

RKO out of nowhere

COMMENTS

By Alexis2742 | 31

#6345472 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:58

Is she okay??

Reply

xx000o | 27

#6346360 - Friday 10 July 2015 11:30

At least you were going to the nurses office.

By StarOfDoom | 26

#6345474 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:58

Ouch. Gotta watch where you are walking.

Reply

pizzas_awesome | 18

#6345486 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:06

'Slip and fall' not 'trip and fall'

Reply

Miss_Whipped | 43

#6345516 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:48

Either way, if the floor is wet or if the OP has shoes that don't have traction (especially on stick-tile flooring or something of the like), it's best to be extra careful.

By youngmessi252525 | 20

#6345476 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:59

You aren't supposed to let the children down

Reply

sorainu | 18

#6345539 - Thursday 9 July 2015 17:15

Greatest comment ever lol

By FalloutScrolls | 25

#6345477 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:59

Hope you're both OK! Accidents happen.

Reply

Feklfekl2222 | 32

#6345558 - Thursday 9 July 2015 18:10

I reckon this was more of a KO than an OK situation

By mds9986 | 24

#6345478 - Thursday 9 July 2015 15:59

Be more careful around kids.

By heeeelp900 | 3

#6345479 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:00

That's that I call a lose lose situation, the girl gets more hurt and you get embarrassment and guilt for what happened to the girl. FYL

Reply

PhinIt2WinIt | 24

#6348404 - Sunday 12 July 2015 7:55

does you even grammar?

naw this is a win win: girl gets to skip class and OP can have an FML

(this comment is a joke so don't take it seriously)

By jakers8424 | 18

#6345483 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:03

RKO out of nowhere

Reply

Dom_Olivares | 12

#6345653 - Thursday 9 July 2015 19:57

STOP THE DAMN MATCH!

By DocBastard | 38

#6345485 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:03

Do they teach walking in Masters of Education programs? Perhaps they should.

By mikeman1744 | 18

#6345487 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:07

Well now she probably feels worse

By teapotrevolt | 27

#6345496 - Thursday 9 July 2015 16:25

However bad this seems or could've been, mistakes happen. Unless the worst happened, (actual harm coming to the girl) it's not the end of the world. :)