Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML
Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML
Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML
Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML
Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML
Today, I realized that it has been so long since my wife and I were intimate that I got slightly turned on watching her suck the meat off chicken wings. I'm jealous of fried, sauce-soaked poultry. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Cum in 30 minutes or less or it's free!
Snowble11 13
Just imagine the food network
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Comments (62)
niquenique_ 7
I don't blame you.
samiraa14 7
Haha I saw this on instagram
janro72 10
ahhh foodgasms
painsteak 0
Weird, I was posting to the creme fraiche and somehow it ends up on your. FM tablet.
calivianya 29
It happens. Good food can be a lot better than sex sometimes.
soldiat_fml 17
Not that difficult, actually. Kind of reminds me of Dirty Minds. I'm pretty sure one of the cards made a refrigerator sound quite sexual.
gazettefan42 8
Shane Dawson was talking about something similar in one of his podcasts
WingedLovely27 20
Dat sausage...mmm.
how_to_implode 17
Hey, pleasure is pleasure. And food is such sweet pleasure ....
magnetic_aura 26
Happens to me all the time! I think I've been single for too long... And I'm a fat kid. The two may have something to do with each other...
Kavka 17
this happens to me all the time. LOL