Today, I was invited to an adult toy party with co-workers. They started by playing a game called 'Never Ever Have I Ever' about everyone's sexual exploits. My mother is a co-worker. I can never un-hear what I heard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, while at a party playing Truth or Dare, I found out my best friend fantasizes about having sex with my 51 year old mother. The rest of the guys at the party then nodded in agreement and thus spawned a group conversation about how "screwable" my mom is. FML
Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML
Did I ever?
Today, I’d never felt like a ho before, until I was at a party where someone decided we needed to play 'Never Have I Ever', and I’d done everything sexual that people were coming up with. I actually felt disgusted at myself. I might need Jesus. FML
Humblebrag
Today, my wife is upset because at a party we took part in an X-rated 'Never Have I Ever', which exposed how filthy I was with past girlfriends, and how boring our sex life is. I’d done almost everything, while she, who’s only ever been with me, had only done 5 things off the list of about 40. FML
Busted
Today, I canceled going to a party with my sisters because I had a secret plan to have a threesome. They left for the party, but soon returned thinking it would be no fun without me. By then we were already making a lot of indecent noise. They heard it all. FML
Make it stop, please
Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML
WHAT?
Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML
Hooky
Today, I decided to play hooky to go buy new toys from the sex store to spice things up for my girlfriend and me. Well, things got awkward when my boss was also playing hooky and in the same sex store after I'd told him I was out for a funeral. FML
Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML
Today, I found out that I work with a bunch of sex addicts. One of them is my cousin, and she did NOT hold back when telling me her and her fiancé's plans about swinging. FML
Top comments
pabj208 23
YDI for knowingly going to an adult toy party with COLLEAGUES and YOUR MOTHER!!!
axfabxdisaster 25
Wait... If you knew your mom is your co-worker why didn't you walk away?
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Comments (83)
chikinscratch00 8
lol
ILikeKoalas 24
Wtf is an adult toy party?
SweetSociopathy 24
Women play games and buy sex toys, lubricants, etc. Alcohol is usually involved.
Brandi_Faith 34
Basically adult toy party is a sex toy party. Someone comes from a store that sells all that stuff and the girls have a chance to buy it, but apparently they also play games and drink and stuff. I have heard this and seen it on tv, never experienced one myself and don't plan on it. Not my taste. :)
CA4495 17
Why would you go to an adult toy party in which your mom was also attending in the first place? That's where common sense would usually kick in D:
anotherhuman 31
I normally would sympathize but you did this to yourself OP.
bnorb 8
I can't understand why everyone is so awkward about their mom's sexuality.. You know, moms are people too, they could've had a crazy past, big news. Who the hell cares, are you 10 years old?
AkaPanda 12
Clearly we know that our parents have had sex however games like that can get pretty detailed and some of us don't want to know about our parents sex life just like they don't want to know about ours. Although in this case op deserved it. Going to a sex toy Party with your mom is basically asking for it.
Merylwen 24
Boundaries, that's why.
gosh_mate 30
This already sounded like it was going to end badly after the first sentence!
ryannmichael 17
Should've brought ear plugs or not gone YDI!
middleagednurse 22
Never have I ever gone to a sex toy party with my mother.
vlalam 24
Now I wanna know what ur mom said to u
Dick_diamond 22
Never ever have I ever gone to an adult themed party with my mother...