Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying, "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML
Today, a woman yelled at me for holding a door open for her. FML
Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML
Today, while holding the door open for a stranger, I thought I was being polite. She walked through, smiled at me, and said, "Thanks, but you didn’t have to follow me into the bathroom." I hadn’t noticed the door led to the restroom. FML
Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said, "Turn around." It was her. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Today, I was outside at a café when I looked at my phone. As I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
Today, I was in a rush to meet some friends for brunch, and I arrived first. The restaurant door was locked, so I knocked. A waiter opened the door and stared at me with confusion before saying, “This isn’t the entrance, ma’am.” It wasn’t until I walked around the corner and saw the correct door that I realized I had been standing at the employee entrance the entire time. FML
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Top comments
limitedition 25
At least she won't be rudely texting while you are dining.
oj101 33
MSG is one of several forms of glutamic acid found in foods. Because glutamic acid is pervasive in nature, being an amino acid. Seeing as the US doesn't ban/regulate them like Europe does, restaurants put up a no MSG sign. Basically, it's an additive.
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Comments (168)
nachosbabygurl 9
your friend is stupid and you ate to for waiting I would have closed the door and said see you inaide
Zomg_Okay 26
Must... resist... temptation...
DDCA 24
This is the future of America...
toaster012 17
Ha..
grant_connor 9
How is this an FML? So what if she didnt know what tht meant
sassy2085 16
Considering there are lot of shops and dining that won't serve you if you are on the mobile phone it seems to be a sensible deduction. At least you know OP your friend is not an arrogant and rude it could be worse. :)
NellyFC35 19
Wow that is the dumbest thing I ever heard....at least top five....please tell me your friend is no older than 13....smh....Sry you had to stand there like a dumb dumb
dabeast15 7
U friends a dumb shit
melons 44
Oh, the irony...
Thr33to16 8
Why is this an FML? This sounds like an excuse to whine about your dumb friend.
pandaboi44 3
wait....bro your friendzoned....gg
crazytwinsmom 25
At least she was trying to be respectful, even if confused.