Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years. I took the whole day to cook a nice meal, and stuck the ring in a cookie that I was going to give to her. In the middle of the dinner I was holding the cookie under the table, about to give it to her. My dog ate it. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it, she picked it up, put it down, and said "No". Then she started to eat her dessert. FML
Today, I proposed to the love of my life by having the waitress place the ring in her dessert. She ate the whole thing and didn't find the ring. I guess the waitress stole the ring. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML
Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M&M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML
Today, I planned to propose to my girlfriend in front of her family at dinner. I had the ring ready and got down on one knee. She immediately burst into laughter and said, "Are you kidding?" The family stared in silence, and I quickly realised she was just teasing me... until I stood up and knocked over an entire table of drinks. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. At the right moment, I got down on one knee. As I was reaching into my pocket to get the ring, she got so freaked out she kicked me in the face. I chipped a tooth and the ring flew off, and now I can't find it. FML
Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend of three years on a romantic picnic to the park, so I could propose to her. The moment was just right, I made my move. I knelt down on one knee and asked her. Her response was, "You're kneeling in dog poop." I looked down. She was right. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I checked the box with the ring to make sure it was still there, and saw a piece of paper in it. It said, "No." FML
Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
"Baby, I've love you so much. It seems I've always loved you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry mFUCKING DOG!!! SPIT IT OUT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!! NOOOOOO!!"
shortystar_fml 0
ydi, you should know the whole ring going into any kind of food never turns into a happy ending!! lol nice thought though :( stupid dog
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Comments (127)
jakeisawake 3
Dude is shit out of luck.
Trace01m 11
that's just stupid.. I mean, really? hey fatty, will you marry me since I put the ring in a cookie? should have just carried on with the romance and left the cookie proposal for tv shows. where dogs eat them and we laugh at the idiot.
jakeisawake 3
So she's fat because he put the ring in a cookie? If he put the ring around a broccoli stem would she then be skinny, or still fat because he's hinting at eating healthier? "marry me since I put the ring in a cookie?" ... Why not marry him since they had been dating for four years?
AthinaMarie 0
I agree with Jake. He was trying to be romantic.. not hint toward her figure. Way to read WAY too much into it.
erika622 0
sucks to be u guess ur gonna be fallowing the dog around w a pooper scooper
mad_hatter0666 22
why didn't you put it on a plate and put it in the microwave until you were ready for dessert? honestly? common sense?
sallen0046 4
Haven't you heard enough horror stories about engagement rings and food to know better than this? You'd be amazed at the number of people who have to seek medical attention for either swallowing, choking on, or chipping a tooth on an unnoticed ring in food or drink. Now the best case scenario is your dog having to crap out a hunk of jewelry and you rooting around in poop trying to find it. From there it digresses to having to pay ridiculous amounts of money to have it removed because it's caused a blockage, or possibly even the animals death. Next time, just give the lady the ring in the box.
VaingloriousXO 0
Sounds crappy to me...
Zmeilerr 22
The dog will shit it out in a day or two. Props to whoever gets the reference.
Icyyy 0
Oprah FTW!
Zmeilerr 22
Actually, I was referring to American Wedding. Props to me! :D
franwins0827 7
Had it actually gone off, I hope the ring was very very obvious - if it was "hidden" then you probably would have chipped her tooth or she might have even choked on it. That said, YDI for being a dog owner and being stupid enough to hold ANY food at his level! Dogs were domesticated on our scraps, and they will take any opportunity they can to get at our food.
Schiffy 18
Well i guess you can propose to her at the vet! God, this sounds like a sitcom.
besosforme 26
Augh, he totally should! When they X-ray the dog's GI tract and the ring pops up on the screen, "Honey..?"
paradocs7 0
marry the dog?