Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years. I took the whole day to cook a nice meal, and stuck the ring in a cookie that I was going to give to her. In the middle of the dinner I was holding the cookie under the table, about to give it to her. My dog ate it. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it, she picked it up, put it down, and said "No". Then she started to eat her dessert. FML
Today, I proposed to the love of my life by having the waitress place the ring in her dessert. She ate the whole thing and didn't find the ring. I guess the waitress stole the ring. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML
Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M&M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML
Today, I planned to propose to my girlfriend in front of her family at dinner. I had the ring ready and got down on one knee. She immediately burst into laughter and said, "Are you kidding?" The family stared in silence, and I quickly realised she was just teasing me... until I stood up and knocked over an entire table of drinks. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. At the right moment, I got down on one knee. As I was reaching into my pocket to get the ring, she got so freaked out she kicked me in the face. I chipped a tooth and the ring flew off, and now I can't find it. FML
Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend of three years on a romantic picnic to the park, so I could propose to her. The moment was just right, I made my move. I knelt down on one knee and asked her. Her response was, "You're kneeling in dog poop." I looked down. She was right. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I checked the box with the ring to make sure it was still there, and saw a piece of paper in it. It said, "No." FML
Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DocBastard 40
"Baby, I've love you so much. It seems I've always loved you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry mFUCKING DOG!!! SPIT IT OUT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!! NOOOOOO!!"
shortystar_fml 0
ydi, you should know the whole ring going into any kind of food never turns into a happy ending!! lol nice thought though :( stupid dog
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (127)
starile 20
lol I see what you did there
iheartglasses 0
I never fail to be amused at Docs comments :D But one commenter was right, you should have brought the cookies in AFTER dinner. What kind of cookie did you get a ring to stick in to? SURELY you didnt BAKE it in to it!?
kdsjr 3
this too shall pass!
Bloodknight 22
hahaha! nice!
LindseyyMariee 0
dont worry you'll get it back in a couple of days;)
JERZBornNRaised 7
nastyyy id just buy a new one, since the stench prob wont go away.. would you want a poop covered ring? yaaaaa didnt think so haha
green_eyes124 0
Depends on how much it was. Rings are expensive. He should wait till it comes out, wash it, take it to get cleaned, and then try the proposal again. He shouldn't tell her till years down the road. : )
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
quick change of plans. feed the dog some laxatives and present the ring for dessert in a cup of "chocolate pudding"
luke1998 0
clever
jakeisawake 3
You should follow this FML up with another one. "My dog ate the cookie that the proposal ring was in, so I followed his/her ass around digging through poo until I found the ring. Then I took it to a professional cleaner, and I tried a second time to propose. My g/f said no, and then she dumped me."
skyttlz 32
Yes! That would make this story better!!
remfire 0
I guess you will be following this dog for several days, as they say "shit happens"
UrLiFsuX 4
can I ask if that's your dog? and if so where did you get him/her because it's gorgeous!!
Richan 0
Aww you're sweet
mfelax9556 8
No see just go outside the next few days spraying his shit with a hose. Eventually you will come across the ring. Just dont tell your girlfriend about it.
zombiekitten87 12
that sucks but I'd be pissed if my engagement ring had been BAKED IN A COOKIE.... WTF were you thinking?
Driftz 3
He didn't bake it WITHIN the cookie. He just stuck it in there. It would all melty and shit.