Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a pig kidney dissection in Biology. I see a 'sack' which appeared to contain a liquid. Being the curious type, I cut open the sack, spraying said liquid over me and my desk. My teacher, after giggling, informed me that the liquid was in fact urine. I was pissed on by a dead pig. FML
Today, I was at my uncle’s farm and his pig had piglets. They looked super adorable, so I picked one up. The poor thing started shrieking bloody murder. Mama pig wasn’t too happy. I have the stitches to prove it. FML
Today, my parents brought home lunch from a shady grocery store deli. They mused about how hard I am to feed because I turned it down; the last time I ate anything from there, it gave me botulism, and it tastes horrible anyway. They both got sick. Now I'm playing nurse to both. No apologies yet. FML
Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML
Today, I ate at Waffle House for lunch, and had a Pork Chop Dinner. I'd never had it before, but I definitely I won’t get it again because later on I was getting ready for a shower and I try to let a fart out. Bad idea, because I shat all over my bathroom. Now I think I have food poisoning from it. FML
Today, I drove my mom home from the salon because she was feeling sick. I'm not the best driver, but I was excited that I was helping. Everything was going smoothly until I hit a bump in the road. My mom blew chunks all over. I found out very quickly that she had spicy chicken for lunch. FML
Today, I was struck at home with a stomach virus. My dad, being an occasional insensitive smart-ass, decided to cook some bacon, sit right in front of the couch I was lying on, and eat the bacon. Last time I tried to eat bacon with a stomach virus... Not pretty. FML
Today, my mom sent me home with some delicious-looking BBQ ribs because I'd missed a cookout due to work. I set them on the counter, intent on putting them in the oven, but had to make a quick run to the bathroom. I came back to find my roommate's cat sitting in the plate, covered in sauce, as he helped himself. FML
Today, I was really excited to be observing my first autopsy for my forensics class. Apparently so was the guy behind me. He barfed up ramen noodles all over my hair and back. I couldn't leave the room to clean up. For two hours. FML
Today, while shopping, I told my wife I'd love some pork chops for dinner. Someone nearby muttered, "That's practically cannibalism, ya fat pig." My wife immediately had a "coughing attack" that sounded suspiciously like it was covering up laughter. FML
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Top comments
lyndis_fml 0
Pity she didn't dissect you.
lindsaylikeomg 0
this reminded me of the trailer for the movie where they feed the baby pig bacon...
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Comments (106)
Talihintti 0
in my school they kept the piglets for bio class in a fridge. the fridge was in the girls' bathroom :) the IB is amazing ;D
ColdGold 6
Were the chops raw? If not, how could it be the same? drama much?
LauraTheKiwi 0
#13, that made absolutely no sense but it was funny and I *laffed*. :D OP; don't go round dissecting 4-day-old dead pigs. Mmm kay?
kennakatherine 0
You fainted? Seriously? That's ridiculous. Suck it up and dissect the pig.
hidey 0
My brother fainted up cutting up pigs in his science class once too. Just be thankful you didn't fall on anything. He fell onto a metal shelf and split his forehead down to his skull. He still has a huge scar 10 years later.
diehexe_fml 0
big deal!!!!!! try dealing with real problems u little princess!
MarshmellowSms 0
loser.
hooot 0
I haven't been able to eat pork since I did pig dissection in biology class.
NuclearButterfly 0
Oh cruel, cruel irony... how you get us everytime! xD
tbell428 0
It was def the formaldehyde that you were smelling. Not dead pig. And trust me that pig was dead a lot longer than 4 days. It may have been in your lab for four days but it had to be preserved and shipped to your school so it was probably more like a week or more. When I took A and P we kept the same cats to dissect all semester. We just kept them in sealed bags. They don't "rot" because of the preservatives. They smell the same on day 1 as day 40. I mean, it isn't a good smell...but suck it up.