Animals, Awkward and Painful: Meat is murder

Meat is murder

By Ihatepigsnow - 07/07/2022 14:00

Today, I was at my uncle’s farm and his pig had piglets. They looked super adorable, so I picked one up. The poor thing started shrieking bloody murder. Mama pig wasn’t too happy. I have the stitches to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 1 251

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Same thing different taste

By unknown - 28/05/2019 04:00

Today, I dissected a baby pig. All I could think about was Wilber from Charlotte's Web. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 403

You deserved it 318

By Anonymous - 14/01/2010 19:41 - United States

Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 256

You deserved it 4 358

Miss Pissy

By Anonymous - 03/10/2019 02:00

Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 1 891

By poohead - 09/12/2009 05:07 - Australia

Today, I was cleaning out my new guinea pig cage for the first time because one of them had babies last night. After using a spatula to shovel up the 3 inch layer of crap and placenta, I decided to hose it down. The hose came on so hard, it sprayed the dung and birth water all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 142

You deserved it 30 194

By Anonymous - 02/12/2009 19:25 - United States

Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 874

You deserved it 7 338

By richardmrcs - 08/07/2013 20:00 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entire ward found out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 117

You deserved it 7 067

By ifpigsflew - 04/10/2010 23:31 - New Zealand

Today, I got hit by a Salami log thrown from a car; its metal wire cut my shoulder. I got scarred by a flying hunk of pig. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 184

You deserved it 2 771

By whymommywhy - 21/04/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 282

You deserved it 26 945

By pigglepigglepiggle - 24/11/2009 02:30 - United States

Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 519

You deserved it 29 595

Darwin smiled

By Ihateracoons - 06/09/2022 06:30

Today, I saw a raccoon family on my front porch. There were 3 little babies. Wanting to keep one as a pet, I scooped up one of the babies. The mother raccoon turned around, made a bizarre roaring, hissing sound, and attacked me. I’m currently in the ER covered in grass and scratches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 5 204

Anderling 32

Thursday 7 July 2022 14:27

Honestly, you’re lucky you walked away at all. There’s a very good reason why boar were so feared and respected in medieval Europe.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 9 July 2022 6:29

You picked up a newborn pig? Big mistake. Pigs are brutal! And considering it was still so young, the mama is going to be extra protective.

Comments

Anderling 32

Thursday 7 July 2022 14:27

Honestly, you’re lucky you walked away at all. There’s a very good reason why boar were so feared and respected in medieval Europe.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 7 July 2022 15:51

Because they're so boaring?

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 7 July 2022 17:40

You are right, Jill. Adult male pigs are boars, adult females are sows and the babies are hamlets.

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 9 July 2022 6:29

You picked up a newborn pig? Big mistake. Pigs are brutal! And considering it was still so young, the mama is going to be extra protective.

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I agree, your life sucks 792

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I agree, your life sucks 3 424

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Meat is murder

Same thing different taste

Miss Pissy

Darwin smiled

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