Miscellaneous: Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot...

By combo - 28/02/2010 09:12 - France

Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 975

You deserved it 27 515

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Same thing different taste

By Hairytoes - 07/10/2011 10:35 - United States

Today, I could actually feel my toe hairs flapping in the breeze. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 730

You deserved it 17 452

By gassy - 12/02/2013 14:18 - United States

Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 147

You deserved it 35 658

By wtf - 30/01/2015 09:00 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 586

You deserved it 2 640

Headshot!

By almyric - 02/10/2019 12:02

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a foot massage. I learned that his feet are ticklish when he kicked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 436

You deserved it 282

By Grrr - 20/07/2012 07:58 - United States - Salem

Today, I was walking in my apartment when I felt something stab my foot. Thinking it was a piece of glass, I looked down. It was one of my roommate's toenail clippings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 374

You deserved it 2 077

By fEk - 22/03/2019 09:00 - Australia

Today, I couldn't find my reading glasses, thinking perhaps i'd dropped them outside, I stepped off my deck bare foot, straight into a steaming dog turd. Only to see my glasses chewed up a few feet away. It went between my toes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 978

You deserved it 323

By Anonymous - 11/05/2011 14:10 - Australia

Today, I discovered my boyfriend is incredibly ticklish on the bottom of his feet. Trying to be a bit flirty, I slowly slid two fingers down his calf and mockingly tickled his feet. He reacted by inadvertently elbowing me in the nose, nearly breaking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 873

You deserved it 43 583

By all5fingers - 08/09/2011 05:23 - Canada

Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 617

You deserved it 3 243

Scream

By dating a pussy - 18/02/2014 21:15 - United States - Maryville

Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 228

You deserved it 5 757

By scaryhairy - 04/11/2009 01:44 - United States

Today, I accidentally cut myself with a razor blade on my toe. Not only does it sting really badly, but it reinforces the fact that I have abnormally hairy toes that need to be shaved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 996

You deserved it 5 182

sum1savemeh 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 16:06

I think you might need to shave

TehFuzzyOne 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 16:06

Is that the FIRST time?

Comments

Skull_300 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 20:06

What the ****!?! If your toe hairs are that damn long, I hate to see your snatch hairs!!!

Jaded4good 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 20:28

Another reason to never date a hobbit: this entry.

awesomelylame 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 20:56

You WERE standing in the grass...are you sure it wasn't that?

brandibombastic 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 22:05

shave them!

containsnosoy 0

Monday 1 March 2010 0:02

Heads up, screaming is never attractive. It makes people want to punch you for being an idiot.

bfffness 0

Monday 1 March 2010 0:04

Shut the **** up... don't post stupid shit like this.

GreenDayRHCP 0

Monday 1 March 2010 0:13

this is so strikingly similiar to the previous post. long story short, you naaasty.

kristina2987 0

Monday 1 March 2010 0:24

Hahaha ew!

fylseriously 0

Monday 1 March 2010 0:46

lmfao!!!!!

blitzen123 0

Monday 1 March 2010 1:02

Eww! You need to take care of that.

Keywords

Video games Gamers Annoying Birthday Money Cute Kids Love Health Weird Awkward Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams Parents School Education Anger issues Teenagers Family Capitalism Miscellaneous Relationship advice Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 837

You deserved it 30 760

Today, I've had a crush on a guy for a while - a friend of mine knows this. I finally decided to find out once and for all if there was any chance with him, so I drove to his house, armed with a home cooked meal and wine, only to find the very friend I confided in was at his house. It turns out they are now an item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 152

The Top

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 321

You deserved it 6 836

Today, I was searched and questioned at the airport for having an apple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 946

You deserved it 4 783

Today, I had sex with my landlord. As if that's not bad enough, my period hit, and I bled everywhere. His place is a total bloodbath and I'm worried that he's going to ask me to pay for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 1 207

Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 340

You deserved it 4 010

Today, a stranger came up to me with a flirty smile, greeted me by my name, and asked if I remembered him. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't remember, so I asked him to tell me. He promptly left with a disappointed look. He was the most gorgeous person I've ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 811

You deserved it 7 675

Today, my daughter confessed that she’s pregnant from a one-night stand with some guy she met on vacation in Florida a few months ago. The dirtbag never told her his last name and the phone number he gave her was fake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 135

You deserved it 3 314

Same thing different taste

Headshot!

Scream

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