Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Nice try
Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML
Sorry, but…
Today, I was at a waterpark with my friends, waiting in line for about 45 minutes to go on the biggest ride there. When it was finally our turn, the lifeguard at the top pulled me over and measured me to see if I was tall enough. I wasn't. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Baywatch
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
Bodyshaming
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year-old boy. FML
In space no one can hear you fart
Today, I was at a water park when my stomach started to hurt. I didn’t think anyone was behind me so was I ripped ass so hard, I almost shat myself. However, there was someone behind me, and the look they gave me was disturbing. FML.
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I worked at my job at an amusement park at one of the roller coasters. I have to go around and make sure that every seat belt is around the passenger. I saw my boyfriend in a seat and ran over to say hi. I saw a girl next to him. I had to strap down my cheating boyfriend and the new girl. FML
Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML
Top comments
scorpiogirl666 0
"what I assumed was him checking me out" stuck up much?
kristina3514 0
where does it say she's fat? She could just have a really scrawny boyfriend!
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Comments (148)
JessTrek 0
Never assume a guy is checking you out. It makes you look like an idiot. Case and point.
nuga 0
What is with all these hateful girls calling the OP fat? Sounds like there's some self-hatred and insecurity seeping through there.... OP: You're not necessarily fat; just feed your boy some good home-cooked meals and I'm sure he'll fatten up nicely in no time, haha. =)
turtlellama 0
#40: A size FOURTEEN? Is it just my imagination or is that kind of big?
whatevs80 0
#38 - what are you, 10? Shouldn't you be in school lying down for nappy time? I don't see much of an FML. I previously dated a guy who was skinnier and I knew our weight difference so if we had gone to a waterpark, I would have known I would be in the back. There are alot of smaller wirey guys out there, so I can totally see an average woman being a bit larger, especially if she has curves. And she wouldn't have to be overweight either. Also if a guy(or anyone for that matter) is looking you up and down, you either think something is wrong with you, which reeks of insecurity, or that he is checking you out. So maybe she wan't being so full of herself on that particular point.
MissCherrywhipx 0
You can be perfectly healthy and be with a partner who might either be underweight or overweight. Who honestly gives a shit? You're obviously together cos you like each other. People here bitching or insulting in order to make themselves feel better are pathetic, you're probably close to being obese. Healthy or not, you make no right to make someone feel like utter shit. If she were that fat I doubt she'd off been allowed on the ride. People are so ignorant and retarted. #38, I honestly hope you get the same treatment. You dumb bitch, grow up.
liveitlearnit 0
Wow, I hate people who assume that since you're heavier than your boyfriend, you must be a huge, sloppy, fatso with tons of rolls. Even if you were, what makes it their business I wonder? My boyfriend is about 30 pounds lighter than me, but with a rack like mine, he doesn't mind. :] Stop being so judgmental, jerks like #38.
mrose57 0
I would have given you a big FYL if you hadn't assumed the lifeguard was checking you out. I hate that arrogant shit from either gender. I quit hanging out with a woman I've known for years because she thought every guy who glanced her way was hot for her. My son's gf is bigger than him and nobody cares. But her ego is smaller than yours!
fyourlifedotcom 0
So many FMLs are about fat girls that don't realize they're fat. Stupid American culture trying to teach girls to be content with who they are...fat, ugly and unhealthy.
VegasMade702 0
LoL....im favoriting this one...
strawberry_78 0
Time for a diet! (for your health...obviously your boyfriend likes you the way you are or he wouldn't be with you.)