Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML
Today, I was at a waterpark with my friends, waiting in line for about 45 minutes to go on the biggest ride there. When it was finally our turn, the lifeguard at the top pulled me over and measured me to see if I was tall enough. I wasn't. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year-old boy. FML
Today, I was at a water park when my stomach started to hurt. I didn’t think anyone was behind me so was I ripped ass so hard, I almost shat myself. However, there was someone behind me, and the look they gave me was disturbing. FML.
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I worked at my job at an amusement park at one of the roller coasters. I have to go around and make sure that every seat belt is around the passenger. I saw my boyfriend in a seat and ran over to say hi. I saw a girl next to him. I had to strap down my cheating boyfriend and the new girl. FML
Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML
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Top comments
scorpiogirl666 0
"what I assumed was him checking me out" stuck up much?
kristina3514 0
where does it say she's fat? She could just have a really scrawny boyfriend!
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Comments (148)
pokipoki 0
i dont get these fat chicks who have to justify that they're normal/ not fat/ have curves. you're fat, ok? fat rolls and extra cellulites don't count as curves.
whatevs80 0
To all you children out there who are so quick to call everyone fat. All the starlets in Hollywood that you are trying so hard to emulate such as Lindsey Lohan, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie , are underweight. In some cases grossly underweight. While it it not healthy to be obese, being underweight is equally not healthy. You are at risk for many diseases. As you age it is better for your bones to have a few extra lbs. than to be stick thin. Just because you are thin doesn't mean you are fit. I see woman at my gym who are bigger outrun, outbox and outkick the smaller ones everyday. Also muscle weighs more than fat because it is more dense, so weight really means nothing if you're fit. The Williams sisters, who are about as fit as they come, weigh 159 and 180 repectively and I dare anyone to tell them they are fat.
taylipn 0
hey boyfriend could just be really lanky
didi666_fml 0
Why would you think someone is checking you out, you should know your fat!
bsaucedo 0
dudeeee what a burnnn . hahahaha .
DarkMirror 0
Honestly, if she was heavier than her bf then yes she should've sat in back. But that doesn't mean she's FAT. None of you know the exact body type of her or her boyfriend so no one here really has grounds to judge. And for those of you saying "well she has to be fat othewise she wouldn't be bitching about it" even women who are average sized or even skinny can get in their heads that they look fat, though they are not.
evolveahimsa 0
One of you has a problem. either your boyfriend needs to buff up and start looking like a man or you need to get off the fast food and onto the treadmill. for your sake, i am hoping it is the former as such is somewhat easier to fix i reckon.
tmausiluvsfml 0
Hehe, I feel with you (and I can only second # 106 without even having read the rest). ;) Do not under any circumstances try to go skiing with your boyfriend (at least not if you don't know the size of skis you need and don't feel like entering body weight details next to his). Oh and another tip: feed him!
bkylou 0
I'm a lifeguard. And I'm sorry there's no easy way to say that the heaviest need to be in the back. It doesn't matter if you're fat or just big in general... it's a safety issue. He wasn't trying to make you feel bad, he's just trying to prevent a potentially dangerous situation.
amandax6 0
that's funny :) lol.