Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Nice try
Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML
Sorry, but…
Today, I was at a waterpark with my friends, waiting in line for about 45 minutes to go on the biggest ride there. When it was finally our turn, the lifeguard at the top pulled me over and measured me to see if I was tall enough. I wasn't. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Baywatch
Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML
Bodyshaming
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year-old boy. FML
In space no one can hear you fart
Today, I was at a water park when my stomach started to hurt. I didn’t think anyone was behind me so was I ripped ass so hard, I almost shat myself. However, there was someone behind me, and the look they gave me was disturbing. FML.
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I worked at my job at an amusement park at one of the roller coasters. I have to go around and make sure that every seat belt is around the passenger. I saw my boyfriend in a seat and ran over to say hi. I saw a girl next to him. I had to strap down my cheating boyfriend and the new girl. FML
Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML
Top comments
scorpiogirl666 0
"what I assumed was him checking me out" stuck up much?
kristina3514 0
where does it say she's fat? She could just have a really scrawny boyfriend!
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Comments (148)
gun7runner 5
hahahaha...I would think this would be a FML for your boyfriend
iluvneon 0
Just cause she's heavier doesnt mean she's fat for all we know she could be muscular or a little chubby she just has "more to love" then other girls
mattsan1992 0
In other words...she's fat
qazaq 1
Fat fat fat
pablopoo 7
Says fat chick lmfao
natsaysheyyy 16
Yeah, definite FML for one of them. Either the girl is fat or the guy is a stick. If you're offended by his "heavy" comment, then lose some weight. Otherwise, don't go online and complain about it.
supersitter 11
I agree with #136. #150, stop acting like an insensitive douche
thelonelylurker 0
Maybe lose some weight instead of sitting at your computer bitching about how fat you are?
lalalaloveit 0
That's rude
turkeymonster39 0
hypocrite much?
nightslayer 6
Not rude, it's true.
Jf770 10
How do you even know she's fat? What If she's average or below, and her boyfriends super skinny? And don't judge fat people(LikeMe) I'm not fat cause i eat a lot and don't exercise!! I ******* under eat, and I have a low blood sugar and a low cholesterol and I exercise Everyday.. And look at my picture and how fat I am! The doctors don't even know what's wrong with me. So shut the **** up and don't judge:3
tasian14 12
May b u shld change ur name from lonely lurker if ur complaining abt peps around there computer n get a bf :(
scorpiogirl666 0
"what I assumed was him checking me out" stuck up much?
crazyladydaisy 4
Stuck up? No. Conceited? Maybe.
EdenLis 14
That's basically the same thing..
i_needa_username 17
Just because a girl likes her appearance doesn't mean she's stuck up!!
grajax 24
Well I'd assume she's wearing a bikini or some form of swim wear so a guy looking her up and down would obviously seem a lot like he's checking her out.
ozymandias_fml 0
Well, now you know you are a fatty, so you can work to fix it. I guess not knowing you are a fatty is a bit of a FML, but not really. Put down your sammich, and look in a mirror once in a while and you won't accidentally think others are chubbie-chasers.
Dogmaw 0
Doesn't mean she's FAT, just that she's bigger than her boyfriend. I love me a woman with some FLUFF :))
shumian 4
no.
lonestarfox 0
Yes!
kristina3514 0
where does it say she's fat? She could just have a really scrawny boyfriend!
qazaq 1
Shes not going to say she is fat cause she's self conscious thus the fml, if she was comfortable with herself she would have laughed it off
Andicc 19
If she was self conscious and thought she was fat, then why in the world would she have automatically assumed the life guard was checking her out? If I thought my body was fat and gross I wouldn't think anyone looking at me was checking me out, rather looking at me because I was a gross freak. Most likely she isn't fat at all but has a scrawny skinny boyfriend.
Uduwudu 0
I hope he stays mostly on top!
Internets_ 0
YDI for being a conceited fat bitch.
hawaii_love 0
ouchhhhh. that was harsh!
JKPPS 0
I don't think the lifeguard was trying to make you feel bad, just keep you safe. I've been a lifeguard for many summers at a waterpark, and the heaviest does HAVE to be in the back or the tube will flip the second it hits the catch pool.