Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to an amusement park with my family and we all decided to ride the tallest rollercoaster. As soon as the ride got going, I realized I'd made a huge mistake and was too terrified to open my eyes. I spent the entire ride screaming, with my hands over my eyes, and afterwards my cousin called me a wuss. FML
Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML
Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML
Today, I went to the Grand Canyon with my family. Also today, I found out that I have a crippling fear of heights. My family left me on a ledge hyperventilating and having a mental breakdown, while they hiked for another 2 hours. They won't stop telling me how pretty it was and what I missed. FML
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Almost immediately, I realized that my shorts were no match for the forces of gravity. I spent the rest of the ride clinging to my seat for dear life while trying to subtly cover my exposed ass. FML
Today, I went to a theme park with my friends. I was excited to ride the rollercoasters, but just as we were about to get on the biggest one, I realized I'd had left my glasses in the car. I can't see shit without them, but I decided to go on the ride anyway. I spent the entire time screaming in terror while my friends laughed, while I couldn't see a thing. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML
Today, I tried being the 'cool parent' by taking my kids to a fancy, expensive amusement park, but ended up getting stuck on every ride and getting motion sickness. FML
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML
Today, I embraced my inner child and went to a trampoline park with friends. I was having a blast until I attempted a somersault and ended up bouncing right into a group of screaming toddlers. I was escorted out by a concerned parent. FML
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Top comments
p3kpek 0
ferriswheel - 1 you - 0
moonsolomon 0
How do you get to be 45 and not discover that you fear heights?
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Comments (171)
xxmessedupxx 0
lmfao
plexico 4
Heights are scary! There could be butterflies up there!
Intoxicunt 6
Do you have Lepidopterophobia or something? That was a good spelling bee word.
plexico 4
No, but a couple of FML's on the topic have been posted. I do have Apiphobia and you mentioned the "spelling bee." I'm not familiar with that species, but I fainted nevertheless.
Intoxicunt 6
Damn it. Change of plans: I'm sending you a box of bees for Christmas. Spelling bee, you know. It's like worker bee, queen bee, etc. The spelling bee refers to the intelligent ones, as opposed to the bees who just do physical labor (they call those Mexican bees).
plexico 4
Am I glad I didn't let it slip that birds creep me out, too! I'd probably be quivering in fear if you talked to me about the birds and the bees. You might have to come on over and hold me. :(
SpitFyre 0
Wow, that sucks. For your kids, anyway. Pussy. Nah, I'm kidding, my mom has a fear of heights too, and it's not that bad, but still, I see where you're coming from. FYL, man.
feed_the_ducks 0
Hahaha oh man that Ferris wheel sure showed you.
Aeval_Fae 0
On the bright side... you probably scared the hell out of your kids. Now you have someone to bond with over your newly found fear! Poor kids :/
element01 0
no bitchassness on the ferris wheel
xxstealthxx 0
bull
AshleyRose784 0
ha! fantastic, fear is an amazing thing.
Lizzygirlleee 0
EEW. why is a 45 year old on fml?
zombie_SPAZZ 0
**** you, you're obviously not very bright. this isn't some site just for little teenagers. that's really rude. and op, fyl. hopefully something won't happen again like this. it's not that bad. now you know atleast. :)
Intoxicunt 6
That, and #48 has poor reading comprehension skills. The **** belonged to a 45 year old, the OP could have been 20. Sheesh.
null_fml 11
We're all around 40-50 years old. You might be the only teenager on this site, actually. We're here to stalk young girls, but it looks like so far you're the only one. Women our age just don't compare to the likes of you. By the way, you should turn your blinds the other way, it lets more light in. And I think your dog wants out.
Intoxicunt 6
WHOOPS! Wrong FML. Fail fail fail. Ignore the previous post.
Intoxicunt 6
FML is being weird again... I think my comment showed up...
LilaBear 2
Erm... you do realise there are more people in the world than just teenagers and college aged students? I've read hundreds of FMLs from middle-aged people... why aren't they allowed to use it?
LilaBear 2
I think YOU have poor comprehension skills. The OP clearly said they were 45. "They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML"
glitchead 0
well she was probably thinking she was still on the sign spinner FML lol don't be harsh. and FYI My Teacher gets on here from school and he's in his 30's or 40's and I figured this out after. AND I'M NOT 40, I'M 14! A lot of adults get on because they have more experience with life. The teen FML's just sound a little angsty, or crush doesn't like them back. and those are annoying because you can't have everyone. sorry if i trail off subject i'm adhd.... and plexico, you are by far the most hilarious commenter on here
totallyme247 0
hahaha woww my mom was kinda scared too but all she did was silently pray and joke with us. but crying, really?? grow some cojones =P
gc_fml 0
clearly everyone is exactly the same with their fear of heights, right? Please think before you post