Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at the park, my 3 year-old ran up to a lady, grabbed her chest and loudly asked, "Are these your breasts? Are they private on you too?" FML
Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML
Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML
Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML
Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RodzillaX 30
Those lines do get very long and boring.
cuppycakeslove 20
Ugh, call security, that's public indecency and so disrespectful if its a family park.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (156)
thepancho 1
your kid's obviously had no Idea what was going on. the one who brought attention to it is you. I don't like that. is it different if they were kissing?! her response was dumb but if you had told your kids "hey look at the people on the ride.." or whatever they would never have noticed. raise your kids yourself don't expect others to follow suit
EffYoLife 14
shut up! you sound stupid. they had no business doing that in an amusement park where kids were present! that's what privacy is for! the mother wouldnt have called attention to it if they weren't doing it in the first place.
TheAngryPrincess 3
I'd report her. She shouldn't be doing that at an amusement park with kids all around.
InnocentWings 13
Wow. Seems they don't give any **** about public decency. FYL
crashley21 10
I hope you contacted security. That's so disrespectful!
dmd316 9
You should have alerted the park authorities.... or hit her. Both ways, the bitch would learn a lesson.
niallers_cuddles 4
oh my gooseballs
SolidSteak 5
Violence is acceptable in this situation.
Shamrockbeefy 14
That is scummy taken to another level. "Stop jerking him off please, there are children here" "No, let them watch" Also how are either of them in the mood when they are surrounded by kids and strangers, dunno bout you but amusement parks aren't a huge turn on for me.
fantasyworld 39
Complain to a park employee.
JothamHousden 17
Slap the shit out of her.