Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called...

By Anonymous - 12/09/2013 22:43 - United States - Toms River

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 093

You deserved it 3 955

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/03/2014 23:03 - Canada - Sackville

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 645

You deserved it 6 868

By Emma - 01/08/2011 21:29 - United States

Today, while waiting at the park for my friend, an intoxicated tramp came up to me and asked me out. After I politely declined, he snatched the phone from my hand, threw it on the ground, screamed that I was a "two-timing whore", and staggered away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 111

You deserved it 3 467

By Anonymous - 03/02/2015 19:03 - Netherlands - Kerkrade

Today, somebody poured a cup of coffee down the back of my shirt. When I turned around, I saw a man who said, "You looked like my ex from behind!" and ran off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 172

You deserved it 2 190

Smooth

By firstdategonebad - 12/10/2012 18:43 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 946

You deserved it 2 575

Mom of the year

By Yuni - 08/10/2019 06:00 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant that I always go to, and one of the cute waiters gave me a discount. My mother called me a whore in the middle of the restaurant, then slapped me when I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 535

You deserved it 376

By notnerb - 19/05/2009 10:13 - New Zealand

Today, I met up with a guy from a local dating site for coffee. He walked up, looked me over and said "Ummm, no", then walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 878

You deserved it 8 579

Creeped out

By dadum - 27/01/2011 07:17 - Australia

Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 702

You deserved it 3 683

By Jgfenix - 22/09/2015 00:24 - United States - Aurora

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 920

You deserved it 2 241

By Anonymous - 29/06/2013 17:18 - Czech Republic

Today, I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop, when a creepy 50-ish looking guy sat at my table. He asked if I'm into submissive guys, and if I wanted to dominate him. I'm a 17-year-old girl, and am now scared to ever go back there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 794

You deserved it 3 082

She's a keeper

By Anonymous - 17/01/2023 04:00

Today, I had a Tinder date with a girl who lied about her age; she was 22 but had told me she was 37. She used the word “like” seven times in the same sentence and and announced she expected me to pay her entire bill. I just walked away, so she threw a waiter's tray at the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 370

You deserved it 225

DocBastard 38

Friday 13 September 2013 2:37

That asshole needs to switch to decaf. And get his eyes checked. Either that or you're a two-timing *****.

eddeeezzyy 19

Friday 13 September 2013 2:49

Hey! She's a nice lady!

Comments

meaghanromo 7

Friday 13 September 2013 3:11

Friday the 13ths bad luck is startig

ksks1234 33

Friday 13 September 2013 3:26

I am going to assume you look older than 14, like legal age.

badmandilon 19

Friday 13 September 2013 3:27

He must be a "first-timer drunk."

ifavela89 13

Friday 13 September 2013 4:00

wth that's when you hit him

wesleonard 8

Friday 13 September 2013 4:26

man period.

icepanda 6

Friday 13 September 2013 4:30

wow what a jerk

ShoyuSauceSoup 26

Friday 13 September 2013 4:37

What a crazy man!

AmyJayyy 7

Friday 13 September 2013 4:38

That guy needs to check his sanity level! Did you see if anyone was recording, OP? Hope you're okay!

TAKEEEEES 8

Friday 13 September 2013 4:48

Sorry about that OP :(

joedoedoe 1

Friday 13 September 2013 4:50

he was probably making a vine, don't take it personally

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The Top

Today, a person I've never met called me a whore and spat on me. Why? Because I was babysitting for my neighbors and answered the door for two well dressed women passing out religious pamphlets. I politely declined to take any. Apparently being a 15 year-old girl caring for a toddler makes me a sex worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 570

You deserved it 61

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 458

You deserved it 2 907

The Top

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 151

You deserved it 4 985

Today, I worked overtime with three guys who never shut up about partying and getting laid. When I finally escaped the testosterone and got home, the first thing I heard was my grandpa telling my dad all about how he once fisted a girl to orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 337

You deserved it 3 274

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 638

You deserved it 7 131

Today, I work at a gas station. There's a bald manlet, who we fired because he couldn't do his job, who has been ripping us off by giving away tickets he wins from the slot machines. We banned him from the store. I caught him on the corner, wearing our uniform, with a sign falsely advertising that our coffee is free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 112

Today, at my local amusement park, I decided it'd be fun to meet someone on the roller coaster by sitting alone and hoping that someone nice would sit next to me. I rode the roller coaster 7 times. I sat alone each time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 530

You deserved it 13 819

Today, I cried while masturbating because I genuinely couldn't think of a single person that would fuck me in real life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 340