Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML
Today, while waiting at the park for my friend, an intoxicated tramp came up to me and asked me out. After I politely declined, he snatched the phone from my hand, threw it on the ground, screamed that I was a "two-timing whore", and staggered away. FML
Today, somebody poured a cup of coffee down the back of my shirt. When I turned around, I saw a man who said, "You looked like my ex from behind!" and ran off. FML
Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant that I always go to, and one of the cute waiters gave me a discount. My mother called me a whore in the middle of the restaurant, then slapped me when I cried. FML
Today, I met up with a guy from a local dating site for coffee. He walked up, looked me over and said "Ummm, no", then walked off. FML
Today, I was at a coffee shop with my boyfriend when we got into a little argument. I was trying to keep it calm and quiet, but my boyfriend yelled, "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE DOING THIS TO ME!" The entire coffee shop went silent. Then, an old lady yelled, “Finally, someone said it!” FML
Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML
Today, I saw the guy I met on Tinder and went out with, only to be told “I’m not ready for a relationship, let’s just be friends” out on a date kissing another girl. I interrupted the date to rip him a new one for lying to me, only to be escorted out by the restaurant manager. FML
Today, I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop, when a creepy 50-ish looking guy sat at my table. He asked if I'm into submissive guys, and if I wanted to dominate him. I'm a 17-year-old girl, and am now scared to ever go back there. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
That asshole needs to switch to decaf. And get his eyes checked. Either that or you're a two-timing *****.
eddeeezzyy 19
Hey! She's a nice lady!
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Comments (137)
yobatchofcookies 8
Coffee shop? You were at Starbucks, weren't you, OP? :)
perdix 31
Wow, that's too young to know about "**** 'em and forget 'em" (aka, "hit it and quit it," "pump 'em and dump 'em," etc.) let alone master the lifestyle.
panda_lou 11
Well just because you're 14 and don't know him doesn't mean you aren't a two timing *****.... He could be an uncle of one of the guys you whored around on.
live2loveurself 11
Probably just someone trying to make you feel awkward or something
dbkm 9
He Probably went out with a relative that you resemble a long time ago
katydid91 31
I wonder if this guy is related to the random neck kissing guy.
an3ph 20
Maybe he was somebody from your future.
morella_xx 29
Actually it would be a lot worse if they weren't in public. Poor OP just sitting in her living room, minding her own business, until he smashes the window and chucks coffee at her.
morella_xx 29
I hope he paid by credit card so you could get his name from the cashier.
Not_Impressed13 9
I don't really think OP is looking to date him..
blackonblight 33
106 No, but the cops might want his phone number. Pressing charges for assault is probably possible in this case.
morella_xx 29
At least #108 understands what I mean without it being spelled out. You can't go throwing scalding hot liquids at people, that's assault. I would absolutely file a police report if I was in OP's situation, and having a name is more helpful to police than just saying "some guy."
Tuffley 7
You're 14 in a coffeeshop. What are you staying awake for? Sesamestreet? :/
GlitterScribbles 9
Because 14-year-olds can't just like coffee, right?
hummelkurts 4
Age 14 is usually when people start high school, though. Op could be in the harder classes and need a boost. Besides, what's wrong with wanting coffee?
erinlee0103 13
I started my first job when I was 14 years old taking care of kids who might be young enough to watch sesame street. Your comment is a little insulting.
fantasyworld 39
I read it as she was working there.