Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a bar, when a heavily drunk guy came up to me...

By Anonymous - 27/05/2014 19:26 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was at a bar, when a heavily drunk guy came up to me and slurred "Fuucckkk lady, your face... not even with beer goggles!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 769

You deserved it 5 496

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Chuds out on the town

By GeeThanks - 25/07/2013 02:33 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding, "Well, not completely, I guess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 567

You deserved it 3 987

By Anonymous - 19/08/2009 22:31 - Canada

Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 105

You deserved it 4 706

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 16:44 - France

Today, during a drunken night out, a really trashed friend said to me, "Jeez, even when I’m drunk, you're really ugly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 550

You deserved it 4 087

By Noah - 16/08/2016 18:43 - United States - South Haven

Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 728

You deserved it 2 903

Fight Club

By MyFaceHurts - 03/08/2010 10:40 - United States

Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 855

You deserved it 55 499

By ShakenNotStirred - 11/11/2013 08:18 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, a drunken customer blindsided me after I told him I would not be giving him a free drink after I watched him put his own hair in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 180

You deserved it 2 495

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 18:57 - Canada

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 635

You deserved it 13 125

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 13:00 - United States

Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 975

You deserved it 3 769

By Ad-s - 14/01/2009 05:01 - France

Today, I got together with a small gathering of friends in a bar. I go up to the bar to order something, but with all the music and noise, the barman can't hear what I'm trying to say, so he leans forward, cocking his ear towards me. For some reason, I thought he was being friendly so I kissed him as if we were saying hello to each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 424

You deserved it 22 858

By darn it. - 20/02/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 042

You deserved it 4 156

JustinKirby 20

Tuesday 27 May 2014 23:14

Don't you just adore drunk people?

awilso13 8

Tuesday 27 May 2014 23:14

Wow, that's definitely a blow to the ego... I would've cried lol.

Comments

AlwaysWatching 27

Wednesday 28 May 2014 0:34

He said that because of the "beer goggles"

hemonnne 8

Wednesday 28 May 2014 0:43

what a bitch!

Mauskau 35

Wednesday 28 May 2014 0:49

If he has to get that drunk, it doesn't matter what he thinks. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

silverkaast 9

Wednesday 28 May 2014 20:45

beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

pretty_pretty27 1

Wednesday 28 May 2014 0:52

Futacy 29

Wednesday 28 May 2014 0:57

Just take a moment to assess the situation. You've got your shit together. He's drunk off his ass. You win.

MrBoredomioo 18

Friday 22 August 2014 23:05

...why is your profile pic Stewie making out with himself

Futacy 29

Friday 24 July 2015 22:35

Why does your profile pic look like Mario mid-climax?

Witchylady 17

Wednesday 28 May 2014 1:00

That is just rude. I hope you slapped the Aussie. Hard!!!!!

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 28 May 2014 1:04

Don't take it personally drunk messed up vision you're fine

Petey801 5

Wednesday 28 May 2014 2:33

That's when you pour a beer over that guys head & say he's the one who got wet from you! ;)

xxsakuraxx 29

Wednesday 28 May 2014 16:49

I gotta remember this one! XD

cryssycakesx3 22

Wednesday 28 May 2014 3:33

no. not even a good comeback for someone loaded.

kelsorg 21

Wednesday 28 May 2014 3:37

and this is exactly why I dislike people. sorry op that was harsh.

Keywords

Dreams Jealousy Love Geek Gamers Video games Kids AITA Parents Family Animals Relatable Gun control Money Amazon Annoying Birthday Cute Weird Awkward Health Abuse Social Media Scams Miscellaneous Friends Mysterious School Education Teenagers

The Top

Today, I stuffed my buttcrack with toilet paper right before my job interview because I tend to sweat there a lot and I was wearing a white skirt. I went to the bathroom afterward to take it out but it wasn't there anymore. It could have only gone up two places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 762

You deserved it 15 564

Today, I met my boyfriend in Hong Kong after being apart for almost 6 months. We got to our room and got right down to business. I was just about to come when a voice came over the PA system in the room. "This is just a fire alarm test, sorry for any inconvenience." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 132

You deserved it 5 932

The Top

Today, I nailed a job interview and they hired me on the spot. The only problem was I was bursting at the seams and had to poop really bad. After destroying their bathroom and taking my leave, not an hour later I got a phone call saying they're "gonna go a different direction." FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 215

Today, I came home to find that my roommate had done the laundry. At first, I was very appreciative. However, I wasn't so thankful when I found out she brought home the wrong basket from the laundromat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 470

You deserved it 2 323

Today, I went to visit my aunt who lives 6 hours away from me. Her car was missing from her driveway, but she's unemployed and barely leaves the house. Turns out, she moved in with her new boyfriend and didn't tell anyone, so I had to drive 6 hours back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 483

Today, I got a message from the girl I like. She told me to never speak to her again and not even look at her any more. Apparently the letter I wrote to her was perverted, vile and nasty. I never wrote her a letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 074

You deserved it 2 804

Today, I learned that even though they say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away, it doesn't keep him from putting a Q-tip up your ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 947

You deserved it 3 638

Today, while very sick, throwing up in a bucket beside my bed, my dad came in pushed my face into the bucket. For a laugh, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 840

You deserved it 2 810

Same thing different taste

Chuds out on the town

Fight Club

Top comments

Comments