Today, I walked in on my new college roommate holding his cock. He said "Hi I'm Jeffrey, and this is Jeffrey junior" while directing attention towards his penis. It's going to be a long semester. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my college roommate whom I've never met moved in. Good thing I wasn't completely naked, playing with myself on the couch when he walked in. That would've been awkward. FML
Today, I moved into my new college apartment for the next year. A 45 year old guy with a mustache in short shorts and no shirt answers the door. He will be one of my roommates. FML
Today, I met my new college room-mate. He then introduced me to his imaginary friend. FML
Today, I met the guy who will be my dorm roommate for the fall semester. One of the first things he said was, "By the way, I'm into self-massage, so don't get weirded out if you hear noises coming from my room a lot." Great. FML
Today, my roommate spends so much time in our dorm room that I got a boner when I heard him leaving for class, because it was my first chance in days to jack off in peace. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML
Today, while cleaning the hostel, I had to make some beds in a dorm room. There were three guys in the room, one of whom was sitting on a bed. He looked me straight in the eye and I gave him a big smile before I realized he was jerking off. FML
Today, after a night of drinking, I awoke in the early hours of the morning to a sight of my roommate playing with my penis. FML
Today, at college, I walked in on some kid jerking off in front of the bathroom sink. This place never ceases to amaze and disgust me. FML
Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML
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Top comments
Holybatman 16
Did you shake Jeffrey Junior's hand?
NOWAYJOSE 14
Well, make friends with both of them!
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Comments (202)
don1qot 6
Looks like Jeffrey was just 'pulling an all-nighter' and likes to study hard and hit the books.
beerhead 0
Introduce him to your junior!
MyS3lf 24
Damn dude, your life DOES suck :(
Raheemdplayer 7
That scene should have been in American Pie lmao FYL
TheDifferent 0
He sounds lovely
TeenageDirtbagg 3
Lmao man I feel bad for you :/
writergirl23 19
FML for him u mean u probably walked in on him masturbating.
kbt13 0
I was expecting this to go towards: "and then his pet rooster bit me"
Damajae 0
You got a messed up roomate
FuckOffNoob 6
Introduce him to your junior. if your is bigger, he'll get jelouse.