Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and sister fooling around in the shower together. Supposedly, she was sleepwalking, and he was trying to wake her up. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother having sex. With my boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML
Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend staring at my sister through the doorway while we were having sex. FML
Today, I woke up in a pool of what felt like sweat and tears. Little did I realize, my then-girlfriend had snuck into the house and drenched me in salty water to get me back for kissing her sister. I guess we're even now. FML
Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
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Top comments
christa953 12
I don't even know how I would respond if it were me
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Your sister's a bitch and your EX boyfriend is a douche. Really, it shouldn't be too hard to find someone better than him, OP! Go get 'em! ;)
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Comments (180)
TheFamilyElf 17
Well, seems he's in for a rude awakening when you dump his lying booty.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I have no part in this conversation, but eyebrows the Internet for answers.
XtraEzeee 8
Oh 60, all the answers you need are right hair.
shinymaster3000 23
Good 1 59
BubbleGrunge 18
You know your boyfriend there is a dick, but you have a terrible sister! How you can do that to someone let alone your sibling is beyond me. The boyfriend you can rid yourself of but your sister is there for life. :-/ FYL OP, I'm so sorry!
BunchieRules 31
I agree for the most part, but maybe OP can't get rid of her boyfriend. Who knows, maybe he'll become her brother-in-law. But let's hope not; OP, I wish you the best of luck with your sister and your (hopefully ex) boyfriend.
sampson12 0
I totally agree!
baronsmommy 14
I guess blood isn't thicker than shower water, they deserve each other
phatdaddy62 23
Blood is also not thicker than ****. Just Sayin' !
SqueakyChipmunk 22
But chocolate is thicker than ****. And bacon. Tasty bacon. ...I just had a foodgasm.
phatdaddy62 23
Ok. I cannot argue with bacon. Or with chocolate for that matter.
AnagenisisZagus 13
Sorry, OP. A strain on family relations, and lame ass excuses to boot. You need little luck in finding a "better" half.
kemando 22
Yes, clitoral stimulation is sure to wake her up!
phatdaddy62 23
I don't know about that. Usually within 20 minutes of some serious clitoral stimulation, my wife is sound asleep!
superman369 2
You must be doing it wrong then lol
phatdaddy62 23
Really? She thinks I'm doing it awesomely! After multiple orgasms, she's got to get some sleep!
superman369 2
Really cuz my wife has multiples and wants me to keep going til my jaw falls off
Stupend0us 7
I wonder if he has been with your mother yet. Or is that next?
phatdaddy62 23
That was last night. To use Baseball parlance, he is hitting for the cycle!
LuckyLynx7732 5
And you promptly beat the shit out of both of them?
KiddNYC1O 22
Damn. All cheaters are dumb but this one is strong... Hilarious excuse, though.
phatdaddy62 23
I don't think they were lying. Unless its a really big shower, I suspect they were both standing.
Mama_Umbridge 8
Is your name Tyrion Lannister?
Mama_Umbridge 8
Oh I thought it said brother. Kinda glad to be wrong