Kids, Pranks and Cops: Never try this at home

Never try this at home

By Anonymous - 06/08/2023 13:00 - United States - Grass Valley

Today, a bunch of cops showed up at my house demanding to see my wife to make sure she was OK. Turns out my insane out-of-state daughter swatted me, calling 911 to tell them I had tied up my wife, and been impersonating her for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 134

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Same thing different taste

Sherri Papini has a lot to answer for

By FtHisSHet - 27/01/2023 17:30

Today, my wife faked being kidnapped. She composed a ransom letter and made calls from her phone screaming for help frantically and hanging up. I got the cops involved. Turns out it was all a scam, because she “wanted to see what I’d do” because apparently she “hasn’t been feeling loved” lately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 380

You deserved it 179

Temper tantrum

By "QueenCortana Tiffany Turner" - 07/02/2020 14:00

Today, the cops were called to my apartment because my daughter had a temper tantrum while I was at work. She was naked when they were there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 341

You deserved it 296

By GDBeast - 09/01/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 467

You deserved it 6 317

By SebastianMiko - 09/11/2012 07:18 - Canada - Calgary

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 106

You deserved it 2 323

Gotcha

By Pissed - 28/10/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 737

You deserved it 89

By Ava_Darkflame - 01/01/2017 15:54 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 515

You deserved it 168

I always feel like somebody's watching me

By Chris - 20/11/2012 05:03 - United States - Lakewood

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to come pick up her things, and while I waited I took a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 761

You deserved it 3 519

Not taking it well

By runsinthefamily - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Aurora

Today, my neighbor called the cops on me, claiming I'd threatened him with a gun. Despite zero proof, they took me to the station and gave me hell. I guess what I've learned today is that you should never offend your crazy neighbor by breaking up with his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 009

You deserved it 4 635

By Poopamus - 23/04/2019 14:00

Today, the police showed up at my door asking if I told this creepy guy stalking my girlfriend that I'll chop him up and bury each piece in a different country if he doesn't stop bothering my girl. I told them I did, along with an explanation. Turns out, he's been missing since that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 181

You deserved it 618

By AussieG75 - 21/07/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Augustine

Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 391

You deserved it 2 552

FluffythePink 22

Monday 7 August 2023 13:44

Time for a restraining order and possibly charges for harassment, wasting police time and given the state of US policing, possibly endangering your life. If you don't slap her down hard now, she'll keep going. If she doesn't stop then the legal system will be aware of it and can force a mental health assessment. It maybe the only way you can actually help her. I'm sorry she's got serious problems that are affecting you but if you don't clap back Via official channels then there's no paper trail to back you up if she escalates. Especially with the cops. You shouldn't have to be protecting yourself from your police but you really do need to. 🫂

Charlie Given 26

Monday 7 August 2023 18:27

the laws on mental health greatly vary depending on which state you live in in the United States, in some states she would be getting in trouble for swatting and getting immediate mental health evaluation and other states the family would have to go through a lengthy court process to get it done. 🤷‍♂️

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 7 August 2023 0:44

So where is she? In a shallow grave? Sleeping with the fishes? Chopped up in pieces in your basement freezer? We gotta know!

Anderling 32

Monday 7 August 2023 8:12

I think it may be time for you to cut off your daughter for your and your wife’s own safety.

Haldu 46

Monday 7 August 2023 12:26

I'm not from the USA, so I don't know how things work in your country. But in mine, if there are serious reasons to suspect that an adult has a very serious mental illness who abolishes (at least partially) their perception of reality, their family members can ask to a judge to engage a procedure to evaluate the mental health of this person. And if the mental illness is found by a doctor, there are several other procedures to deal with it : going from according the parental authority to the parents again, to downright put the patient in an asylum if there is a risk for their or other people physical security. I'm not a specialist of mental illness, but those kind of behavior may be the sign of an advenced schizophrenia, so maybe you should ask the help of medical and juridical professionals.