Today, I've been calling my pet snake "Mr. Snake" for two years now. I decided to look up the name, and boy do I regret it. It turns out Mr. Snake is a porn site. I've named my snake after porn and have been introducing him to family with that name for two years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML
Today, I was trying to show my family a cool website. Unfortunately my porn instincts kicked in and I started typing the URL of my favorite porn site. I couldn't stop myself before it autocompleted. FML
I have had it with these mf snakes on this mf plane! Everybody strap in!
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for refusing to have anything to do with "our" pet snake. The same snake I told him not to buy for his son a few months ago, because I knew the kid would get bored with it and dump the responsibility onto us. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
Today, my friendly neighbor asked me to check in on his apartment every few days while he's gone on vacation. You can imagine my horror when I walked in for the first time and found out he's a snake breeder. Twelve more days to go. FML
Catcalled
Today, I tried to talk to my cat, but accidentally called him by the wrong name. He responded immediately to the incorrect name I used. Meanwhile, his actual name rarely, if ever, grabs his attention. My cat hates his name. It's way too late to change it. FML
Thanksssss
Today, my cat decided to show me just how much he loves me by bringing a live snake into my bedroom. Thanks. FML
Steve? Pete?
Today, I found out that I've been calling my boyfriend's dad by the wrong name for the past two years. No one had told me sooner because they liked laughing at me for it when I wasn't around. FML
Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML
Today, I went to the pet store to get mice for my mom's snakes. While checking out, the guy working behind the register asked what kind of snakes I had. I told him they were my mom's and he mentioned this crazy woman that talks to her snakes. That's my mom. FML
Top comments
UnidentifiedFun 37
Well I mean unless your family members are frequent users of that **** site I don't think calling a snake Mr. Snake is that out of the ordinary
toastbrot 9
I don't think anyone will ever think that you named him after the **** site. after all it's a snake calles mr snake. pretty clear to me why he has that name.
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Comments (65)
legendof90 14
Why would u look up mr snake?
kemando 22
I'm sure there's some nefarious site named for "Mr. Bear" too, doesn't mean every person will just associate their child's teddy bear with that.
KobeLebroJordan 17
I knew a girl that named her pet lube
mrpoolofdeath 4
Thank you sir
dragoongirl90 34
Unless you intended it that way, you did not name it after that. Not everything is named after something else, ffs.
Zestus 19
yea but does your anaconda?
Manylan 16
I got two pet rats. One named sugar and one named diamond. They sound like a stripper duo xD Mr. Snake isn't that bad :)
kittykatjaure 8
idk why but I find this ****** hilarious
ItsThisGirl 17
Not even a big deal.
tigeresscrazy 12
I feel for you when my sister and I were little she gave me the nickname HJ it's a combination of my first an middle names but if you google it you see that it can also mean something entirely different lol even though we're adults now she still calls my HJ lol