By Anonymous - 09/02/2013 20:03 - United States - Chula Vista

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 885
You deserved it 4 915

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

txgirl2013 14

Well it's better than my cousin calling his zebra a "stripper" because of its stripes.

I say let the child be a child. That's the beauty of being a child the innocent.


Theres nothin better than a horny unicorn

I'd leave some perverted pun joke about horny ponies, but then I'd be buried with anti-Brony stuff. So, in its place I left everybody a boring useless comment that adds nothing to the post.

29 If you can't say anything to add to the conversation, why say anything at all?

That would be entirely due to the fact that they are an ass.

I used to have a stuffed whale name 'spermy' because I saw a show about sperm whales... Must have been so awkward to be my parent in public.

jojimugo 20

Yes there is a horny pillow unicorn ..

iammeorami 25

that's for sure

txgirl2013 14

Well it's better than my cousin calling his zebra a "stripper" because of its stripes.

That depends on how old your cousin is, also if an adult/teenager suggested the name .

7yzz 18

Who cares, they're 5, they dont know what that means, its harmless, let them have fun. It'll be a funny thing to bring up when friends come over. This isnt an FML at all..

dmoran20 27

And that depends on if the person commenting above me is really that dense.....

7yzz 18

Who cares about either of those names, the kid is 5, she doesnt know any of the sexual annotations behind them, without those, those names are just as innocent as any other name. Just let her name it what she wants, shes 5. Can be something funny to bring up when your friends come over =]

...where does your cousin live that he owns a zebra..?

razzledazzle21 23

I'm quite sure it's a stuffed zebra.

too bad the horn isn't hard, its very soft

You have a sick mind.

dude what da shit ur talking about?she is five

Agree with #74! That's just grim...

Rancor 5

It actually turns out, young prepubesent girls are the horniest creatures on this planet.

84 your comment is down right disgusting.

84- How do your know?

dmoran20 27

#84, that's just ******* sick....

beannlove 7

ive seen something similar to this, though it was a horny dinosaur rather than a horny unicorn. hopefully the people she decides to tell have a sense of humor and just laugh it off

cass1_l0ve 13

Just wait till she's old enough to know what it means.

adatheunicorn 8

I can't wait to see that FML.

She will make a rage comic ending in "Oh god. Why?"

#56,i saw a lof rage in ur photo

cajekraze 7

Exactly! OP needs to get this on video for later in her life

BubbleGrunge 18

Ahhh, it's cool OP; it's a child's toy, she doesn't know any different. Horney is a perfectly acceptable name for a unicorn! :)

Omfgitsmia 15

Awwe that's cute and funny. Maybe offer a new name for it?

If there's one thing I know about strong willed little girls (my lil sis is one of those), it's that telling them to change what they've already decided on NEVER goes down well.

Michael_92 20

Mr. Long Horn maybe?

I say let the child be a child. That's the beauty of being a child the innocent.

think u need to losen up a little and see the funny side. it could be worse wen i was a kid i used to have a ferby called herpy

Yeah, it really doesn't get any worse than owning a Furby... *shudder*

dmoran20 27

I don't know, remember garbage pail kids? Those were awesome lol!

#9 I've been watching too much MLP. (female brony) I immediately thought Herpy Derpy Hooves. Derpy Hooves is the name of a pegasus. Wow. I am weird.

No, sweetie, you're not a "female brony." We are Pegasisters.

Wait until she get married so you can joke about it in family gatherings haha.