Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML
By
Anonymous
- United Kingdom - Romford
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By
Teyros
| 24
Bring your friends over and show him up!
Reply
MrSassypants
| 32
"How much did you pay your "friends" to come over, Mary?"
Reply
EpicSquishii
| 21
15- The scene in Family Guy where Meg has a picnic with her dead "boyfriend" in the woods comes to mind lol
Reply
banana527
| 12
Or just text urself from ur fone. It beeps as if u got a message, but it just sends ur txt back to u. Change your contact name in ur fone Johnny❤ and then it looks like ur not a loser...... Don't ask me how I no this........
Reply
RaggleFrock
| 13
41- that's a lot of effort. Get a real boyfriend.
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Banana527, I put your comment through my Idiot-English Translation Engine, but it overloaded and exploded. So now I have to fucking repair it. Again.
Thanks ever so much. Maybe next time try using an actual language when you post a comment.
Thanks ever so much. Maybe next time try using an actual language when you post a comment.
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
Oh 41, you're so naïve it's almost adorable. You must be new here, so I'll go easy. Learn the English language. Use it. You're welcome. Don't just txt evry1 lik ur txting ur buddies. Shit don't work that way 'round here.
Reply
Jovecove
| 13
Mary had a little lamb
Reply
ICastillo
| 24
It's fleece was white as snow
Reply
superminty
| 18
Unfortunately enough, God forbid someone express themselves using spelling separate from the accepted form.
Reply
mohamm11
| 4
Can't see 41's comment! Was it reported?
Reply
Spyingcheeseman
| 8
So if you had sex with a hot guy he wouldn't believe you? NOWS YOUR CHANCE!
By
rikitsumiatsu
| 11
Tell him at least you pretend to have friends he just knows he has none and can't even pretend.
Reply
XxDevilxXGt
| 26
OP would be a bit late on the comeback though, just sayin'. :P
Later that day:
OP:"By the way dad, you can't even pretend because you KNOW you don't have friends!"
Dad: "Honey, you probably had to browse the internet to come up with that."
OP: *runs away to post another FML*
Later that day:
OP:"By the way dad, you can't even pretend because you KNOW you don't have friends!"
Dad: "Honey, you probably had to browse the internet to come up with that."
OP: *runs away to post another FML*
By
TheManager
| 6
Your dad is awesome. Only the boring dads refrain from making fun of their kids.
Reply
MrSassypants
| 32
I know, right? My dad called me fat, punched me in the face, set me on fire, then threw me out the window saying "fly fatty! Fly!" Ah.... good times, good times...
Reply
TheManager
| 6
Oh, you!
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
Gimpy!?
Reply
theannonymousone
| 0
23, I still hate you for landing on me.
By
accioshannon
| 17
Most dads are like that, aren't they?
Reply
ShannyAK
| 16
Ignore your dad! Have a good time op!
Reply
JenkJenks
| 6
Or laugh with your dad since it was a joke and you need to be able to take little shots like that. Don't be so sensitive.
By
TorturedXeno
| 27
Trolldad strikes again.
Reply
RoperGirl203
| 9
Your profile pic is cute.:3
*pulls up chair and waits for the mass wave of thumbs down*
:)
*pulls up chair and waits for the mass wave of thumbs down*
:)
By
NotGabe
| 28
At least he doesn't think that you're going out to impregnate a girl. Every. Single. Time. I can't even buy Pokemon without him thinking that.
Reply
ohcheriecherie
| 20
I think....OP is female... I mean, the name is Mary, and assuming she's biologically female...
Reply
poccocurantes
| 7
Maybe he's a Hobbit.
Reply
dalink
| 24
I think notgabe was referring to himself.
Reply
eyesmile27
| 7
So my parents aren't the only ones who do that!
Reply
dmoran20
| 27
If you tell them you are going out to buy Pokemon cards then I promise you they really do hope you are out impregnating some one ;-)
By
denden_mushi
| 10
Were you actually pretending? It's okay to say it, we're all friends here.....
Reply
TheAbstract
| 15
Just not with Mary.
By
mangoboy1
| 19
Your dad is a dick
Reply
VannahJane
| 17
Nah he's just a funny guy
Reply
RoperGirl203
| 9
8, you're a dick. Lol
By
lucyy123
| 14
That is just sad
Reply
AssTard
| 15
That's kind of the reason they posted it here.
By
GypsyBones
| 7
Tough love. If you were bluffing then hopefully that was a nice kick in the ass to get out there and make some friends. If ya weren't, well, that's dads for you.
Later that day:
OP:"By the way dad, you can't even pretend because you KNOW you don't have friends!"
Dad: "Honey, you probably had to browse the internet to come up with that."
OP: *runs away to post another FML*