Today, I thought about my boyfriend and all the things we used to do together years ago. Today, I also spent the day doing my now husband's laundry and watching him sit on the couch with his hand inside his underwear. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
The art of seduction
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML
Turn it off
Today, I got dressed up in lingerie for my boyfriend. He looked at me, said, "Nice," then went back to watching TV and drinking beer. FML
Today, I wore my boyfriend's favorite shirt to surprise him and show him how sexy I look. He made me take it off and pay the bill for dry cleaner. FML
Today, I came home to find my fiancé trying to do laundry. His version was "rubbing the smelly spots with baby powder". Looks like I'll be the only one doing laundry for the rest of our lives. FML
Today, I put my boyfriend's t-shirt on and took sexy pictures with nothing else but panties. I then sent him the pictures. His reply was, "Can you wash that when you're done?" FML
Today, per my boyfriend's request, I bought some lingerie. He got so excited when he saw me, he ripped it off me right away. After we were done he used it to clean up. I essentially bought a $40 cum rag. FML
Crazy nights
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML
Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML
Today, I decided to pay a suprise visit to my boyfriend's house. I let myself in, walked up to his bedroom and found him dancing around. In the dress I had left the other weekend. FML
Top comments
tb15 0
from strictly the FML, your life does not sound F'd. You can't expect relationships to be filled with passionate romance every day.
TrimKibbles 12
This is quite frankly the worst thread I've ever seen.
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Comments (47)
tazz9690 0
He did his job. He married you. Now go make him a sammich. And stop your bitching.
Rickityraou 0
^win I tell my girl that after she blows me
rosemary_fml 5
you are the reason i never want to get married.
IndigoFuckYou 9
50-I'm with you. You brutish, disgusting men give the few quality guys out there a bad name.
g02hell 2
sometimes a man just needs to know ther're there
jpest17 5
I wish my mom would do somthing,my dad has to make breakfast lunch and dinner, and go to work while she stays home and messes up the house so he has to clean up.
rachelann915 0
#14 I know why your screen name is 'no friends'. your a bitch
nofriends28 0
#29 Why? Cause I don't fell sorry for a poor woman who has to do the laundry while her husband has the audacity to sit on the sofa? I'm guessing you've probably never lived with a significant other (or had one) and don't understand how these things work. Both people don't do the exact same, equal work at the exact same times. It doesn't mean one is lazy. Just different tasks, different times. And I actually have lots of friends and all the guys I have been with really loved me and still think I treated them wonderfully. Go **** yourself.
pluralbusted 0
maybe you should follow suit?
thongs4lyfe 0
god u guys need to chill, smoke some shit or down a few. so ****** wat if ur man is sittin on the couch wit his hand in his pants and watchin football! stop tryin to make ppl feel sry for ur fatass, no one ****** cares, let the man b, cmon havin an ****** and watchin football is like a mans two fav things in life,let him have a lil fun!!!
klakuv 0
North jersey and LBI give us a bad name.... ;(
JESUSlives4MUSIC 0
I think there's only one logical explanation 4 your husband. he was obviously watching something with KISS in it
pattheaninal 9
oh that's just great! watchin' superbowl on tv with your elbow down your underwear. your husbands a real genius!
rosemary_fml 5
well, your husband sounds like a gross ****. and if youre unhappy, then go out and enjoy yourself. buy yourself flowers. go exercise at a gym. do whatever. evaluate your situation. if this is the total outcome of your life and the way it will always be, find a way to make yourself happy. You have the keys to your happiness; you just have to use them. Even if it takes a divorce.