Love: Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife....

By Anonymous - 05/05/2012 02:27 - New Zealand - Palmerston North

Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 792

You deserved it 2 167

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Shady dealings

By CaptBlood - 04/05/2021 14:01

Today, my wife says she's not hiding money from me but I checked our joint bank account, which I no longer use, and find she's been transferring money in-and-out of 3 accounts, while taking money from me and getting payday loans to cover it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 108

By sickandtiredofit - 24/01/2012 19:50 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 269

You deserved it 3 106

Black balled

By Don't complain about good fortune - 20/02/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my wife somehow found out that my "surprise bonus" from earlier this year was actually hush money from my boss to keep quiet about her affair. Rather than let a good thing alone, she threw a fit and called my boss's husband. Now I'm jobless, and my boss has sworn I'll never work in my industry again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 242

By Anonymous - 08/02/2017 08:00 - Korea, Republic of - Pyongtaek

Today, I broke it off with my mistress so that I could work on my marriage. Shortly after, my wife received an anonymous message, saying that I'd been unfaithful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 552

You deserved it 25 081

By Somerandomguy64 - 10/12/2013 18:04 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 222

You deserved it 9 753

By Anonymous - 20/02/2016 12:53 - United Kingdom - Mitcham

Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 772

You deserved it 2 226

By SebastianMiko - 09/11/2012 07:18 - Canada - Calgary

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 087

You deserved it 2 313

Double-crossed

By Anonymous - 13/04/2020 20:00

Today, I found out my husband wasn’t really “working from home” in the evenings. He locks himself in his office until the late hours of the night, having intimate Skype sessions with his coworker. That explains why our joint bank account hasn’t seen a direct deposit this past month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 168

Thrifty

By Viscerion - 24/04/2023 07:30 - Australia

Today, even though I recently started earning $75000 per year, my partner still got angry at me because I spent $10 online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 118

By humbug - 13/05/2012 13:08 - United States - Broomfield

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been paying her half of the rent by taking my ATM card and getting money from my account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 495

You deserved it 5 606

MsSoulReaper 27

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:32

Your wife must not trust you :/ Sorry OP

blcksocks 19

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:37

You work 24/7? When do you poop?

Comments

jackassiddy 8

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:41

Return the gift and buy a hooker. When she finds out just claim double jeopardy. You're welcome.

klovemachine 24

Saturday 5 May 2012 22:04

woo woo woo you know it!

marisa1436 5

Sunday 6 May 2012 10:08

You are a genius!

live2swim 5

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:43

:( I'm Srry op. Your wife should be thankful that you care about her so much not accusing you of cheating.

itsalanis 25

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:44

She has some serious trust issues. But, don't worry OP. It'll all be her own wrongdoing.

zebraface123 6

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:45

NIPPLES!!!!!!!

jujubunni5 9

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:48

That sucks :/ I'm sorry. But when you give her the present she'll feel like an ass

heyred 11

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:51

Working 24/7 tends to eff with someone who is already insecure. Talk much?

thiscrazything 1

Saturday 5 May 2012 19:49

Working 24/7? What?? Does OP sleep work?

ZombieFayad 6

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:52

Yeah but she doesn't know that.

perdix 29

Saturday 5 May 2012 5:57

You get paid to sleep and shit? If not, you don't literally work 24/7. So, where's the money going, playa?

humorizer 14

Saturday 5 May 2012 6:01

Actually, 24/7 doesn't necessarily mean that they were working nonstop the entire day. I work "8 hour shifts", yet I have a 1 hour lunch, and often talk to coworkers when there are no customers (we get paid purely on commission, so don't worry; we're not slacking off or riding the clock).