By CaptBlood - 4/5/2021 14:01

Shady dealings

Today, my wife says she's not hiding money from me but I checked our joint bank account, which I no longer use, and find she's been transferring money in-and-out of 3 accounts, while taking money from me and getting payday loans to cover it. FML
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By  Chazzster  |  20

I can think of two possibilities:

(1) Wife is hiding money in plans of moving out with the money and leaving you with the bills. Immediately, if not sooner, move the money to an account she cannot access if it’s in a joint account now before you confront her.

(2) Wife has a spending or gambling or drug habit that is causing her to spend way more money than you have. In the old days I would suspect that moving money from account to account was a way of creating a “float” of money for a few days before the check clears - But now there is almost no “float” time as banks clear checks much faster now.

Sadly the first is the most likely and you are very fortunate if you found the money before she moves it to an account you cannot touch. Salvage what you can of the money to an individual account or cash then contact a divorce attorney.

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  Bogrbon  |  23

Depends on if OP lives in a community property or an equitable division state. Also depends on what she was doing with the money. Wasting assets may mean that she's stuck with the debt and the court takes it out of her side of the divorce settlement. Get a good lawyer.

By  Charlie Given  |  23

Umm that sounds like scam artist shit and you're the one who will be held accountable for her actions. Time for a lawyer to cover your ass from the fallout that will happen.

By  Chazzster  |  20

I can think of two possibilities:

(1) Wife is hiding money in plans of moving out with the money and leaving you with the bills. Immediately, if not sooner, move the money to an account she cannot access if it’s in a joint account now before you confront her.

(2) Wife has a spending or gambling or drug habit that is causing her to spend way more money than you have. In the old days I would suspect that moving money from account to account was a way of creating a “float” of money for a few days before the check clears - But now there is almost no “float” time as banks clear checks much faster now.

Sadly the first is the most likely and you are very fortunate if you found the money before she moves it to an account you cannot touch. Salvage what you can of the money to an individual account or cash then contact a divorce attorney.

By  Lydmyers  |  8

hmmm... this is a tough one.
either
1. she has a terrible spending habit and shouldn't be trusted with money.
2. she is getting ready to leave you.
3. You are the one with the terrible spending habit and can't be trusted with money.

By  Yummi_913  |  15

Do you beat her or make her so unhappy that she feels she has to prepare an escape from you instead of thinking simply asking for a divorce is an option? Does she have a drug problem? A shopping problem? A secret guy/family/child/friend she may be funneling money to? There can be tons of reasons for this and some of them could be your fault as opposed to hers. Best you have a CALM sit down with her and discuss things. If she wants to leave, let her. No use in her wasting her life unhappy. And you deserve someone who wants to be with you and isn't going to lie to you (provided you're not an abuser).