Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my wife says she's not hiding money from me but I checked our joint bank account, which I no longer use, and find she's been transferring money in-and-out of 3 accounts, while taking money from me and getting payday loans to cover it. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
Today, my wife somehow found out that my "surprise bonus" from earlier this year was actually hush money from my boss to keep quiet about her affair. Rather than let a good thing alone, she threw a fit and called my boss's husband. Now I'm jobless, and my boss has sworn I'll never work in my industry again. FML
Today, my yearly bonus finally hit my bank account while I was busy at work. Hurrah! Unfortunately, I'm married, so by the time I got a second of free time to check my phone, my email was full of my wife's online shopping receipts, including a non-refundable cruise. I wish we could save money… FML
Today, I broke it off with my mistress so that I could work on my marriage. Shortly after, my wife received an anonymous message, saying that I'd been unfaithful. FML
Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years-old. FML
Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
Today, my brat daughter got pissed that I didn't spend "enough" money on her Sweet Sixteen party. She threw a tantrum and told my husband about my affair. FML
Today, I found out my husband wasn’t really “working from home” in the evenings. He locks himself in his office until the late hours of the night, having intimate Skype sessions with his coworker. That explains why our joint bank account hasn’t seen a direct deposit this past month. FML
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Top comments
MsSoulReaper 27
Your wife must not trust you :/ Sorry OP
blcksocks 19
You work 24/7? When do you poop?
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Comments (100)
kissestoyouxx 0
Sorry OP I feel bad for you Hugs and kisses to you xoxo :(
missnuthin 10
Sounds like she isn't happy with life either right now. So what's more important to you? Your work, or your marriage? Because working 24/7? The choice WILL get made, and if you put it off too long she'll make it for you.
Epsilonyx 15
93, you make it sound like she has boobs growing on her head..
poohappens26 0
It's because more than half the men in this world are pigs.. Can't trust no one. Plus maybe she trust you but she dont trust home wrecking hoes. Give her the gift early and show her.
thatoneguy79 10
As a married couple, the whole "yours" vs "mine" does not work as well. The money is for the family, not specifically for one spouse. If OP's spouse is the primary bookkeeper for the family due to OP's long work hours, then she may have been counting on that money for other things, such as electric bills, Internet bills, water bills, mortgage/rent, food, fuel, etc. Combined with long hours where her husband is not home, unexpected expenditures, and probably no answer from OP where the money went, it is feasible for OP's spouse to think of the worst possible explanation; cheating, gambling, mid-life crisis purchase, blackmail, or even tax-deductible charitable donations.
ImafukNskittleYO 4
For her to not trust that you wouldn't cheat on her, you must have done it before or have been showing obvious signs. But it sucks she couldn't have asked "why?" before she shared her thoughts.
aaghmylife 9
fyourwife
imperialtl 12
This is why you keep separate accounts for day to day life and a the joint account only for major family decisions.
aaghmylife 9
I don't even know why OP married her if she is that paranoid...
sammis 0
Hashtag, most online banking sites allow you to view your statement online, and that includes seeing what stores money was spent at. If it was a known jewelry store, like Zales or something, OP's wife probably thought he was buying a present for a girlfriend. While I don't agree with the wife's overreaction, this could be why she assumed he was having an affair.