Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML
Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
Today, while walking to my bus stop, I saw a girl slip on black ice, then catch herself, and I laughed because people catching themselves slip are hilarious. I reach the same patch of black ice and go flying, falling on my hip and spilling my coffee all over me. FML
Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. It wasn't all that embarrassing, until I walked two more feet and slipped again. The second time, a man pulled over and loudly asked if I was drunk. FML
Today, I slipped and fell on the ice while attending a community event for work. A man came to help me up, and I farted really loudly. FML
Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML
Today, I slipped on a patch of ice I couldn't see, spilling the groceries I was carrying everywhere. Strangely, despite landing on my left knee, I didn't get a bruise there; my left butt cheek hurt though. Apparently, falling forward can still have you pull muscles. I pulled a butt cheek muscle slipping on ice. FML
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
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Top comments
ipodtoucher123 0
u have balls on ur butt?
emilyjune519 0
Hilarious. But ow.
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Comments (145)
glasswater 0
I'm pretty sure it's physically impossible to fall on your balls. Whether you fell backwards or forwards, something else would have hit first.
tab_ga1990 0
how is it impossible? i was wrestling with my boyfriend and i pushed him on the bed after getting him off me, and he was in the sit position and sat on his balls. you know balls hang there? they just dont stay in one place. and they are not all the same size either. so its not impossible
l1douchhe1l 0
did u gais have sexy time
johncow123 0
splits
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Well, I guess he failed to grab life... (puts shades on) ... by the balls. (YEEAAAAHHH!)
shaBAMalex 0
LOL
Insert_Wit_Here 0
Men don't bear children....
fangles 0
Boy, would THAT be an FML or what?
daydreamstar 7
you know what I mean ;)
Insert_Wit_Here 0
Horatio strikes again *shakes fist*
CarterColbie 4
Lol.
that_guy321 2
haha. this comment's the best. i gotta call fake though. if it's cold, then you've got some shrinkage. no way can your balls get between your ass and the ground.
FD929 0
Sounds like a case of elephantitus. might wanna get that checked out.
GBPackersGal 0
very nice pic. :)
Batman4890 0
droopy balls much...
zelly05 0
maybe* lol
grimspook76 0
How ******* big are your nuts man?
Gobsnoglin 0
I just threw up in my mouth a little bit from the empathetic pain I felt. You have my sympathy sir.
Digithead 0
it would be slightly, but only slightly, worse if a group of bikers broke your fall.
ragingflame 0
Lol I feel you pain dude, once inmy youth group we went bowling and some nerdy kid everyone hates dropped a bowling ball on my nuts. (He just doesn't know it will hurt me cuz he doesn't have any)
razorp 0
I would have broken that fall with my dick, not my balls
The_Norwegian 2
Win.