Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML
Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
Today, while walking to my bus stop, I saw a girl slip on black ice, then catch herself, and I laughed because people catching themselves slip are hilarious. I reach the same patch of black ice and go flying, falling on my hip and spilling my coffee all over me. FML
Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. It wasn't all that embarrassing, until I walked two more feet and slipped again. The second time, a man pulled over and loudly asked if I was drunk. FML
Today, I slipped and fell on the ice while attending a community event for work. A man came to help me up, and I farted really loudly. FML
Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML
Today, I slipped on a patch of ice I couldn't see, spilling the groceries I was carrying everywhere. Strangely, despite landing on my left knee, I didn't get a bruise there; my left butt cheek hurt though. Apparently, falling forward can still have you pull muscles. I pulled a butt cheek muscle slipping on ice. FML
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
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Top comments
ipodtoucher123 0
u have balls on ur butt?
emilyjune519 0
Hilarious. But ow.
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Comments (145)
jameobob 0
Purple nuts!!!!!
kup13_fml 0
good ole testicles, always looking out for you
doof_fisch 2
So...you used your happy sack as an airbag?
DogFun 0
Though it is possible to sit on your nuts, it really isn't possible to FALL on them due to the laws of physics. Adding to this would be the laws of biology, when your balls are cold, they go higher. This makes this story even less likely.
lickmyjock 0
You mean your snow globes?
me5 0
Were u naked?
grrrrmetigers 0
wait... you dont walk around naked in public when theres ice outside?
JojoPotatoe 0
Oh BOLLOCKS !! (sorry that one was easy...) Ouch, I can feel your pain mate. I've sat on my balls a few times too sitting down too fast and when you think about how much JUST THAT hurts as shit you don't even want to imagine what it must feel like FALLING down on your own nuts... so FYL.
CallMeHush 1
That is the trouble with a saggy baggie.
MisterZzyzx 0
Been there, done that. FYL cuz that totally sucks.
fatman1970 25
Yelp! That made MY eyes water. My sympathies to you.