Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Cheers!
Today, I saw some servicemen sitting outside a café, and I went over to thank them for their service. They waited till after I was done shaking their hands before they told me that they were just actors on their lunch break. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
Stolen valor
Today, a fake soldier tried to chat me up at a bar. I know he was fake because one of his medals is only given posthumously to soldiers who died in combat, like my own dad, yet this creep was claiming he earned it himself. When I confronted him, he busted out my front teeth before running away. FML
Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML
Run for the hills!
Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML
Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Thank you for your service
Today, I was pretending to be a veteran for the US Navy at a local outlet, because I was desperate for cheap stuff. All was going well, until an actual vet pointed out that the ship I had on my naval hat was a fictitious one. Shit. FML
Spooky
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said, "It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
Top comments
Zomg_Okay 26
I think 10 minutes was a little excessive, regardless of whether or not he was a soldier.
perdix 29
Are you a stutterer? How long does it take to say, "Thank you for your service?" It's easy to confuse work uniforms with military ones. The paper hat and the stench of rancid fry grease should have tipped you off.
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Comments (152)
Zomg_Okay 26
I think 10 minutes was a little excessive, regardless of whether or not he was a soldier.
ZeroZoom 6
Why was he in a uniform if he wasn't a soldier?
Rancor 5
I'm totally gunna try this out, especially since I have crutches because I fell of a treadmill and destroyed my knee. Op is gunna be thanking me while her friend is planting a bomb in the church across the street and I would think that op is a terrible friend for making her friend plant the bomb, while she is just distracted me so op, ydi for being a crappy friend.
JerryH 9
Or maybe he wasn't a soldier but 10 minutes is nowhere near enough to thank them for all that they do for our country, they put their lives on their line to fight for our freedom and they see and do things no person should ever have to. Freedom doesnt come free
Zomg_Okay 26
There's a big, angry "debate" just waiting to kick off in response to your comment, 21. Tread carefully.
Zomg_Okay 26
Especially if you're going to be using terms like "our freedom". I can assure you, American troops did not win my country's freedom.
juturnaamo 29
Before I joined, I had a big, powerful dog, and a front door that was never locked. I've never come home to a dead robber and blood on my dog's muzzle, but just him being there was enough to keep my home safe. That's what having one of the most powerful militaries in the world does for you.
Zomg_Okay 26
I disagree. The might of the U.S Army didn't prevent 9/11, did it? Sure, the dog went chasing after the burglar. But only after he'd already made off with the goods.
gribbles 12
So, how about we don't get into this lengthy argument and say we did, yeah? Here, I'll do if for you. Guy 1: 'MERICA! I bleed automatic weapons and unmanned drones. Chap 2: rabble rabble rabble! Bloody Americans! You're all fat but somehow beat us in the Olympics every year. Rabble! Btw, there's terrorist attacks all around the world. Good luck in any government stopping them.
jessi_sunshine 26
59 - You're really going to fault the US Military for not preventing 9/11? Who possibly could have? You think if those planes had been directed at France's Eiffel Tower or India's Taj Mahal, someone magically would have foreseen it? No. We don't have superpowers. Our military does, however, do a lot for our country on a daily basis and they deserve a lot of respect and support for that. Preventing 9/11 has no correlation on how good or bad our military is.
Zomg_Okay 26
63 - I wasn't faulting the U.S. Army for not preventing it. I was disproving 54's claim that just having a powerful military is enough of a deterrent to stop terror attacks.
jessi_sunshine 26
65 - Someone burgling your house isn't a terrorist act and once again has nothing to do with the US Military considering most of them live on bases here in the US or are doing tours. I'll concede that 54's comment was rather ridiculous. Civil disputes are common enough and horrific enough that you should still lock your doors at night, no matter how safe you think you feel.
lilhellian 26
Guys there was an issue between the departments. The guys did say they weren't interested in learning to land.. The lack of communication paved way for this!
Zomg_Okay 26
A terrorist act is an act which instills terror. Being burgled is terrifying. Arguably, a burglar breaking in is a terror act. But that's irrelevant. The burglar and guard dog was 54's comparison to terrorists and your army. I was merely using the same example to point out that a big, powerful deterrent isn't necessarily enough. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take 62's advice and walk away from this comment thread.
Daiyuki 5
So a dirty debate is better?
hellbilly205 17
It really pisses me off when someone dresses in uniform that isn't in the military our uniforms are a part of us, if you're gonna wear it you better be ready to fight for freedom, if not don't wear it regardless if you support us or not it's disrespectful.
NeonPopRocks 14
The Naughty Step? Noooooo
wannabemom 5
Stahp.. Just stahp. No fighting, peace man.
cynicalhumanist 9
Normally people just equate camouflage and uniforms, so there's no need to get upset.
TomPusslicker 21
21- It seems you found a way to summarize all that needs to be said to a few sentences...
Darkmagic666 9
59, 9/11 is not the military's fault at all. It was caused by terrorists, and sadly things like that happen all over the world. That military that you trash talk is one of the only reasons you can do such a thing. Many service members are very good people who have a high chance of coming back injured or not coming back at all. And also the dog's priority is it's owner's safety.
chell1894 13
Yeah he just wanted to get rid of her.
tjv3 10
That is an automatic ass whooping . I hope you kicked his ass
marinaim 17
Someone who volunteered their life to the country wasn't worth 10 minutes? I thought Americans were supposed to be patriotic
iheartkanye 8
It's more of the soldier would get annoyed with 10 minutes, he'd appreciate the sentiment but he probably has places to go...
ohcheriecherie 20
149, what? No, i'm not going to harass someone for 10 minutes and call it patriotic. If anything, I'll thank them when I pass by so as not to bother them.
zykrithium 22
Stolen valor assholes don't seem to give a shit.
MatteKudasai 17
Why did he wait 10 minutes to tell you?
Zomg_Okay 26
Entertainment.
mclauren29 22
***** and giggles
SexyQueen0905 24
Better question: Why did OP take 10 minutes to thank the man, when a simple, "Thank you for your service," or "I salute you and your service to our country," would have sufficed?
patrickalamo 47
He couldn't get a word in.
MURIKKA 11
I think that I would start laughing after 10 minutes too, regardless of whether or not I was a soldier.
RinaVampire31 18
Well, that's embarrassing.
howdeedoo 22
Really? Because we all thought OP enjoyed it
Shenanigans9 8
Obviously op had a fun time. Thats why they posted this on fml.
chrisp87 11
So is your profile picture
perdix 29
Are you a stutterer? How long does it take to say, "Thank you for your service?" It's easy to confuse work uniforms with military ones. The paper hat and the stench of rancid fry grease should have tipped you off.
FalaFala 8
Couldn't have said it better. How hard is it just to thank a person without rambling on and on about it?
ChaoticBacon 6
I-I-I- agree c-c-c-completely.
perdix 29
#112, tl;dr
sens3sfailing 24
^i feel like an idiot for not understanding....
moonfull101 13
Poof goes the good will
seacadet 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
If he was actually wearing an army uniform, you should have beat the shit out of him! ******* asshole impersonating military men and women!
lysx84 24
Perhaps he was an actor? Or in costume to raise money for charity? Or just said he wasn't a soldier to get rid of OP? He's not necessarily an asshole.
alexandrialala 6
Why? Maybe he was wearing just to wear it. My friend's boyfriend used to wear his father's uniform.
MuseFan1991 14
maybe he wasnt wearing an actual uniform, just camo clothes? i've seen that alot. also, so what if it was? as people have said, it could have been his father's. my little brother sometimes wears my dad's medals to special occasions
morella_xx 29
#18, has your brother ever heard of the Stolen Valor Act? You do not wear what you haven't earned.
morella_xx 29
I ran out of time to edit after seeing you're in the UK. While the law doesn't apply, the sentiment should.
jennifer5 6
Nobody has a right to wear a uniform unless they've earned it. He was the ass hole for giving people the impression he was a soldier.
outoftown 26
#106, Really? A young son not allowed to wear his dad's medals (presumably with dad's or the family's permission)? This may be a family tradition of the son honoring the dad.
seacadet 18
If you read my comment you would see I said *ARMY UNIFORM* not just camo clothes, also not all military uniforms are camo... Again, if he was wearing an actual uniform without earning it, he's an asshole!
seacadet 18
Exactly... Didn't earn them... Don't wear them... I have medals from my grand father... I have never once worn them... I have my own uniform, with my own ribbons.
Blue_Coconuts 7
Technically the Stolen Valor Act no longer exists, the Supreme Court repealed it based off of the First Amendment. That doesn't make it any less dishonorable though... To 137, it would depend. If it's a little kid who pins on medals to his shirt then people wont say much. If he's an adult and he's putting on the full uniform with medals, then it's a bit weird, and it can be insulting to people. Especially if they're awards like a Purple Heart, Bronze Star or something else. People who have earned them usually don't like people who haven't wearing them. Best thing to do is just not wear them. There's better ways to honor someone that wont potentially insult another.
Harpy20 24
With my mother's permission, I would wear her full uniform[BDU's] on days like Mother day, Veteran's etc. It was my way of honoring her service to our country and people understood it. I didn't wear her ribbons, just the rank. People would come and pay tribute and I would nod and explain that I would pass the thanks on to my mother. No harm done.
MuseFan1991 14
id like to clarify, my brother is 14 atm, but he's worn them since he was about 3 or 4. he doesn't wear all my dad's medals as obviously my dad will wear some. he also pins them on the opposite side to where the Vets pin theirs, to show he's wearing someone else's medals. when i say special occasions, i mean weddings or memorial day services, not common ones like birthdays
GhostChickens 17
They probably got away with it the same way actors and people at fancy dress parties do. I don't know what that way is, but there is a way.
ChadBrisson 5
Honestly when I'm in uniform and people come up and thank me, while I appreciate it I really don't know how to answer. You're welcome feels snobbish but thanking them for thanking you seems backward. He was probably uncomfortable and trying to get you to stop going on about it.
juturnaamo 29
I agree with you completely. I've been in 4 years, never deployed, so I always feel awkward when someone thanks me. I usually just smile and say it's a good job, and that the Army takes good care of me.
ariaofdoom 16
I smile and thank them in return. It can be overwhelming, especially if you've ever gotten off a flight at Bangor or DFW.
Devilpuppy0861 7
I just say thank you for the tax dollars. It throws them off guard every time and they get so see that we're actually human.
Oscar_Grouch9 4
In the Marines we have strict guidelines on wearing our uniform in public, as oppose the army, which honestly I disapprove of wearing utilities in public for marines have died in them, and it seems awkward that the army lets them. For us it's strictly dress attire.
Oscar_Grouch9 4
Also I can't help but smile being a deployed veteran, when I'm on a flight in coach and some boot army guy in utilities gets attention and first class treatment, funny but then again we try to avoid attention, makes me feel awkward.
seacadet 18
Well then let me say "thank you for your service Marine -SN Z. Carroll NSCC/USMC polee
Oscar_Grouch9 4
Thank you, remember when you go in, be loud, be fast, and push yourself, for in the end of the day, the pride you'll get will last you for the rest of your life, and it can't be bought or given, but earned, you'll find yourself among the great men before you who wore that uniform. It'll be tough, but it's supposed to be, for that way you'll be proud of your hard work, and don't do it for attention, do it for your family, the men next to you in it, and of course for your country. Semper Fidelis
seacadet 18
Rah! Semper FI!
sugarshane007 20
Good 'ol assumptions! We all know what happens when you assume! That being said, ten minutes passed?? A bit excessive of you as the fool, and for him in keeping up the ruse.
juturnaamo 29
People make stupid redundant jokes? Is that what happens?