Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML
Today, my friends learned that if you play "connect the dots" with the pimples on my back the resulting picture is a large penis. FML
Today, I got out of the shower and noticed a tiny leaf on my penis. With legs. Squirming. I have a new nickname. FML
Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML
Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
Today, I panicked when I saw a spider on my shoulder from the corner of my eye. It was a birthmark. The same one that has been there for the last 23 years. FML
Today, I woke up to large spot of blood in my underwear. This wouldn't be too big a deal if I didn't have a penis. FML
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Top comments
ThatLooksSticky 16
What kind of fish is that? A blow fish?
tencentsakiss 19
Are you male or female? I feel like that influences how f-ed your life is considerably.
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Comments (82)
perdix 31
Just tattoo some hairy balls underneath it, and learn to love receiving anal.
tencentsakiss 19
Are you male or female? I feel like that influences how f-ed your life is considerably.
seahorses4eva 4
^ I'd have to agree.
Hot_mamas2255 0
at least you dont have three birth marks
worldclass 0
You're so strange, but I kind of like it.
All_For_Love 0
always lve your comments :))
generalasskicker 12
guess your boned
PplMakeMistakes 2
YOU'RE SO LUCKY !!! I WANT ONE TOO ! Gimme it !! :D
stronghand0331 17
You want a penis or a birthmark?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
or did you want a penis shaped birthmark?
GTmustang07 0
she wants the penis
PplMakeMistakes 2
:D
sourgirl101 29
There's an old wives' tale that claims, a baby's birth mark is in the shape of whatever the mother craves during her pregnancy. So.... it makes sense to me.(: *I have one in the shape of an apple on my hip.
sourgirl101 29
You did, did ya? I'm now wondering what your mom craved when you were inside her belly, kicking on her rib cage?
stronghand0331 17
Boners, your birthmark looks like a cat with herpes... The wives' tale was very true.
Vasin_fml 15
Then my mom must of liked faces that look like :o haha
A_Friend 0
Maybe she liked to make that face
Sparx1_1 16
God is saying **** the world and you're his messenger.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Well, at least you're unique! On the bright side, you may be able to impress the ladies (or men, depending on what gender and sexual orientation you are) with your crazy birthmark. It's likely to be a good talking point and something no one has seen before.